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"I don't think we'll need to do that, but I will keep that in mind, thank you both," she said before turning to face the rest of her students. I felt like we had been effectively dismissed again.
Adam lingered, looking at Wolfgang, who was talking excitedly to Tyrek next to a terrarium housing what looked to be a bearded dragon.
Adam looked like he could stand there all day, so I hesitantly grabbed his elbow and started guiding him for the door, giving Wolfie one last small wave. "Adam, he's going to be fine… That's one tough boy there."
Adam nodded, though he didn't look so sure. "I know he'll probably be fine. I'm not so sure about me," he said as he let me guide him through the halls between the bustling groups of children.
The bell rang as we walked back down the stairs. "You headed back to the office?" he asked.
I shook my head. "Not until noon. I have a couple of things I need to check out first. I thought I might head home and sneak in a run really quickly, though."
"Well, at least let me take you home. You shouldn't have to pay for a taxi all the way back to your place," he offered.
"I don't know if that's such a good idea."
"It's not like I'm going to bite you, Reagan. You made yourself clear yesterday, you don't need to worry about it," he said, leading me back to his car. I wasn't so sure about what he just said. Maybe he could behave himself, though that was questionable, but I wasn't trusting myself at that moment.
All the same, I got into the passenger side of the car and resigned myself to an awkward drive back to my apartment.
But as soon as he got in the car, he looked at me and said, "I think we have a problem here."
I looked at him and knew instantly that it didn't have anything to do with our kiss or the undeniable attraction to one another he was talking about. It was about what Wolfie had said back there. "Adam, I don't think you need to worry. You heard about Miss Henderson said…"
"Exactly. She said he doesn't have to worry because he's got people in his corner, no matter what. And I am in his corner, no matter what. But here I am, having made other plans to find him somebody else, and…" he trailed off looking helplessly through his windshield as he started up the car.
"And what?"
He was shaking his head to himself as he pulled out into traffic. "I don't think I can do it, Reagan. I can't let the kid down. I should've never asked you to look for somebody else. Is there any way you can take it back?"
I sat there, stunned. I wasn't really surprised I had fallen for Wolfie—he was a hard not to fall for. But I was a little surprised at how quickly Adam had come to the realization. Adam was stubborn as hell on a good day and stuck in his ways. I was shocked to hear him admit so quickly that he wanted to give Wolfie a forever home.
At the same time, I was a bit leery. It hadn't been that long, and they were still getting to know each other. What would happen after the day in and day out grind of raising a child fully set in? It seemed a little soon to be making such a huge decision, and I expressed that to Adam. "There's not really a way I can take back the inquiry once it's out there. Now, we can always say that you changed your mind and you all have found a suitable living situation with one another. But Adam, I want you to really think about this before you pull the trigger on that," I cautioned him.
"What is there to think about? I love the kid, and I think he loves me. We get along, and yes, this situation is tough as hell, but I can't take away the only other people he knows. Not now."
"I understand what you're saying, Adam. But what happens when the newness wears off? I'm not trying to be cruel. I just believe we need to think a bit more rationally about this," I argued.
We were at a stop light when he turned and looked at me, hurt all over his face. "There goes that 'we' again. You know you don't have to be a part of this, Reagan."
The light turned green, so he hit the gas, weaving his way through morning traffic. "That's not what I'm saying, Adam. Of course I want to be a part of his life. I care a lot about him. But it does have its complications if I'm being honest," I admit it.
"Complications? You don't say? Exactly what are the complications for you in this situation, Reagan?" he asked angrily.
"Um, hello, being close to Wolfgang means being close to you," I pointed out heatedly.
"Oh, and God forbid you would have to be close to me. God, do you really think I'm that terrible?" Pain flashed in his eyes as we drove closer to my apartment.
"No!" I shouted. "That's the problem, Adam, I can't trust myself around you." I wished I could take back the words as soon as his eyes jerked to look at me, disbelief written all over his face.
I saw him swallow hard as he just looked at me, and I felt my face flame at his inspection. A horn honked behind us and forced us to pay attention again. Adam went through the intersection and eased the car into a parking spot in front of my building.
He turned off the ignition, and I rushed to unbuckle myself. I just wanted to get out of there.
"Reagan, come on, don't run out on me again. Let's talk about this," he said and followed me as I hurried out the door.
"No, there's nothing to talk about. I'm tired of making an ass of myself in front of you. Just forget I said anything," I said, whirling around towards the stoop of my building and rushing up the steps.
"That's not fair, you don't get to put that bomb out there and then just walk away. Hasn't my life been upended enough? Now, you're going to add some kerosene to the flames?" he asked, gently grabbing my arm and forcing me to turn to him.
