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“You don’t have to tell me, and I actually wish he would do something as well. It’s better than the worrying and wondering if something is going to happen. Is he going to do something? Is he coming after me? If he was locked up I would finally be able to stop looking over my shoulder. All this restraining order really gives me is knowing that he will definitely be locked up if he steps out of line. But what if he steps out of line in a way that I don’t recover from? What if he kills me?”
Her face became very grave with concern. I’d rarely seen Alice look so serious. “You really think he is capable of that?”
“I think everyone is capable of things they never thought they would be under the right circumstances. What if he just decides that if he can’t have me then I won’t be with anyone else either? I’m a possession to him. That’s how it has always felt. And the way he acts… it’s like I’m this thing just for his ego. But I know that one day he will probably fixate on someone else, but I don’t know if he will let me be since I’ve offended him so much. I need to be punished. The sickness in his mind is so pervasive and toxic. It infects every part of him. I wish I knew how to fix it, but I don’t think it can be fixed. It can only be contained. And I think the only way to contain it is to lock him away or put him under the damn ground.”
Alice nodded and finished her ice cream. We both sat there in silence for several minutes. My head was now full of so many conflicting ideas. But I tried to focus on happier times and things. I wanted to focus on Mason.
What was going to happen between us?
Chapter 11
Mason
“So, I want to talk about the kiss,” I said.
I was sitting on the couch across from Laney, much like I had been last night when things had started to escalate between us. We’d just put Jack down about ten minutes before and we were now both enjoying a hot cup of decaf coffee.
I’d been thinking about this all day long. I was barely able to sleep last night because I wanted to see her so badly. It was gnawing on my mind all day during meetings and work site visits. I felt like I was distracted all day and I didn’t really get that much done.
But now Laney and I were both here and we had the time to talk about it. I was ready to hear her thoughts and express how I felt about things. I’d made that decision that I would let her know I was not sorry about the kiss, not at all. It had happened and I wanted it to happen again. I wanted to experience everything with her.
“Ok,” Laney said. She was acting calm and had a little twinkle in her eye.
“I find myself unbelievably attracted to you,” I said. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for a while. And it felt amazing.”
Her eyes widened and I could see that she was acting happy about this as well. That was a good sign. I was happy to see her response so far.
“Ok…” she said. “I was worried that you would think it was something we shouldn’t do again. I just started working here and I really don’t want to do anything to jeopardize that.”
“That isn’t something you have to worry about. But did you enjoy the kiss?”
“Oh, I did. I loved it. I’ve wanted to kiss you for a while. I think the first time I saw you I found myself really attracted to you, but I know you are going through some things. I’m not sure what I’m looking for. On one hand I want to keep this casual because I’m working on trying to make some dreams come true. There are things in life I want to accomplish, but I don’t want to sacrifice any of that by getting involved with someone. But at the same time, I just don’t want to let this go without knowing.”
“I understand,” I said. “I totally do. But I’m with you there in that I want to see how this goes.”
She smiled at me and nodded. “I’m glad.”
I stood up then and sauntered over to her. I sat down on the couch beside her and stared into her beautiful eyes. I reached up and eased my fingers through her hair, brushing it off her forehead as I followed the strands down her back. Her hair was so soft. It was the softest thing I’d ever touched and warm to the touch yet cool somehow. It made my skin tingle with anticipation. I rested my hand on the back of her head and leaned in to kiss her softly.
