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“I like being with you too, Seb.” I try to sound polite and keep how good he makes me feel under wraps, but the way his eyes pierce into mine makes it hard to concentrate on anything else. I feel like he’s right on the edge of giving up this whole friendship charade and kissing me before we leave. Or am I just reading too much into it?
I’ve meant everything I said to him. Even though my parents’ marriage ended in a messy divorce, I know that not all marriages are like that.
“You might barely know me,” I pause for a beat, assessing whether I should say the rest of my thought out loud. “But I want you to know I’m here for you, if you need someone to confide in, no matter the subject, I’m here.”
His mouth spreads in a wide smile that makes my face fall a little. “That’s very kind of you.”
“Well, that’s what friends do, after all.”
We share a quick chuckle, but then he remains quiet for a moment, as if thinking something through. “Do you like flowers?”
His question is so random and unexpected that my eyes widen in surprise. “Eh, of course. Why?”
“Just curious.”
Once the sun has finally set, it’d be the perfect occasion for us to kiss, but instead, Sebastian abruptly stands up. “It’s getting late. You must have homework to do, right?” he asks, extending a hand to help me up. I take his hand in mine, causing a jolt of electricity to rush through my body.
“I guess so” I sigh inwardly, disappointed at the lost opportunity, but I push the feeling away and grin at him. “Will I see you again soon?”
Seb smiles at me, his eyes twinkling in the twilight. “As much as I want to say no, I know I will be lying.”
All of a sudden, he leans down and kisses me on the forehead, his lips warm against my skin. I shut my eyes instinctively, reveling in the moment. His kiss, slow and gentle, spurs a trail of excitement through me. As he pulls away, I catch a hint of his cologne, reminding me of our dance.
“Let’s get you home,” he rumbles, and I take his offered arm and let him lead me back to where we parked. As we walk back to his car, I find myself thinking about where this all might possibly lead. Will we just be friends as he said, or something more? Only time will tell…but I know what I really want from him. And it isn’t friendship.
5
Sebastian
DrivingJulia back to her flat in the heart of Amsterdam, I’m both smitten but also lost in thoughts. Spending hours with her and being so friendly after hyping myself up all day to tell her we can’t see each other anymore is overwhelming, but I know I need to get real. The last thing I need is to have her mother or even mine on my back, reminding me I’m not a good fit for her.
The drive is quiet, Julia fiddling with the radio to show me some of her favorite songs, and I’m shaken about how easy it is just to be with her. I can’t help stealing glances at her every once in a while. It still feels surreal that the young woman I first saw in the library, hiding from everyone, is now here in my car beside me. Fate is a funny thing.
As we stop at the curb, she turns to me with a suggestion, her voice full of hope and excitement. “We should have a picnic in that park next Saturday. It’d be fun.”
My heart rate stutters as I hesitate, unsure of how to respond. I know that I want to spend more time with her, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to give up on my mission of separating myself from her slowly. “I’ve got to spend the weekend with my family.”
Julia’s eyes light up with anticipation as she responds, as if she knows she has me in her grasp. “We can do it on Thursday evening, then.”
I consider my options, knowing if I decline she would be hurt. It’d be the right thing to do since that would ensure I’ll never see her again, but I can’t seem to find the will to go through with it. Damn it. I have seen her just twice and yet here I’m already caring about her. A gush of air rolls off my lips as I consider what to do next. “I have a better idea,” I tell her instead. “I'll pick you up Thursday at six pm.”
Julia nods, her expression filled with visible excitement. “Sounds perfect.”
Before she exits the car, though, she leans in and kisses my cheek impulsively. I feel a rush of adrenaline shoot through me at the touch of her lips to my skin, like a stupid teenager, flustered over a simple cheek kiss from a pretty girl.
“Goodbye, Sebastian,” she purrs, her lashes low.
“Bye, Julia.”
Watching her walk away, her long legs and delicate figure disappearing into the ornate entrance of her building, a sense of longing starts taking over me, of wanting to be with her no matter the cost. I even consider what would happen if I just parked and followed her inside. Would she open the door for me, let me inside her home? Would we spend our time on the couch just talking, or would she want to show me back to her bedroom…?
Gosh, why did she have to be Margaret’s daughter?! Age gaps like the one between Julia and I are not uncommon, and on paper, we would be a fantastic, if unlikely, match. The unification of our families would be beneficial all around, given how affluent the Van Dierens are, and there is no doubt that I want her, that I feel for her. I’d never let her be unhappy. It just doesn’t make sense why Margaret is going as far as talking to my mom to keep us apart.
Thinking about Julia’s mother just pisses me off, so I let my mind wander to thoughts of our upcoming date. A picnic would be nice…a decadent spread of food, fine wine, and the two of us nestled together on a soft blanket in the park…but I have other things in mind, not to mention the fact that I wouldn’t trust myself not to throw all the food aside and lay her down on the blanket, having her for dinner instead. Fuck, I can’t wait to see her again, to feel her close to me, to show her how much I care. My cock jumps at the idea, and I have to adjust it in my pants or risk a rather uncomfortable drive home.
I know that our newly-lit romance may be socially inadequate, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make it work. It’s been such a short time, but I can already see a future with Julia, and I’m determined to make sure we have a chance to give it a shot together.
My daydreaming is interrupted by the ringing of my phone. Unsurprisingly, it’s Dad, reminding me of the dinner we apparently have planned with his associates. I feel a pang of guilt for forgetting about it, but then I pause, frowning.
