AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Better him than me, I decide, and I wait until he makes it all the way in before dropping to my knees and shuffling after him. It’s a tight squeeze, but it’s apparent he made it quite a bit bigger in just a few minutes of work. Which is attractive, to say the least, seeing how effortlessly he can provide for me in this completely made up survival scenario.Not attractive, I scold myself, closing my eyes to squeeze the thought out of my head.Comforting. It’s comforting that a member of my pack family is able to provide for me so efficiently.
There’s no way to sit up in the cave, so once I make it all the way in on my belly, I twist to flip around onto my back. It’s a lot more intimate than I anticipated. Though Lincoln is barely out of breath, I’m still panting from my earlier exertion, and our combined body heat soon fills the small cavity.
“It’s ... cozy,” I admit, impressed. “I could totally fall asleep in here.”
“My brothers and I used to sleep in these when we were younger,” Lincoln shares, tipping his head to the side until we’re looking at each other. “Used to drive my mom crazy. Sometimes we’d just hide in them until she came looking for us, then we’d burst out the top screaming when she came near. We’d get saddled with a bunch of chores, and my dads would have to listen to her rant about needing more kids so she could finally have some girls to balance out the testosterone she had to put up with.”
I smile. It’s a cute story, and even cuter to think about a mischievous, younger Lincoln getting up to no good. He’s so serious and strict, it’s hard to imagine him playing a prank like that. I shift my body until I’m resting on my side so it’s easier to look at him.
“Your poor mother,” I cluck, laughing.
“She has a few nieces, luckily,” he states as he too turns his body to mimic my position. “You did good, Espy,” he praises, glancing around the cave.
“Yeah? Think I’m ready for the big leagues? Should I join Search and Rescue instead of trying the whole college thing?” I tease.
“Don’t you dare,” he growls, and I freeze as I feel one of his arms come around my back and pull me into his chest. “These skills are to be used in emergency situations only, not so you can risk your life intentionally traipsing around the mountains in dangerous situations.”
“Okay,” I squeak out. Is ... Could he possibly beholdingme? I stay frozen as my mind goes a mile a minute, inadvertently breathing in a deep lungful of his heady scent.
Neither of us says anything after that, and I have no idea how much time passes as we just lie here. My hormones feel like they’ve gone haywire.Thisis why I told Mackenzie I wasn’t ready to look for a pack, and why I told her I wasn’t into Pack Collins. These arenotfeelings I should be having for someone in my family pack.
I suddenly come to a realization that turns my blood as cold as the walls of this cozy cave. What if everything my father did to me actually messed up my omega “sensors,” or whatever the hell it is that helps omegas navigate finding the right pack? He put me through some pretty extreme treatment, and with all the alpha hormones he brought around me, both synthetic and straight from the source, maybe I’m more damaged than I realize. He was trying to make me susceptible to alphas; trying to force my body into heat as an attempt to draw alphas to me to end my suffering. I grit my teeth in hatred at the memories that come spilling in. What if I’m having these reactions to the alphas around me because my body has somehow primed itself to react to any alpha that way? What if he actually succeeded, and I’ve finally snapped?
“Espy?” Lincoln’s voice is worried. He can’t see my face since it’s pressed against his chest, but even I can smell the way my scent has soured—a clear signal of distress. “What’s wrong, little one?”
“I—N-nothing,” I sputter, shoving against his hold as I try to extract myself. It takes longer than I want, but I manage to make my way out of the cave without collapsing the entire thing. The outside air feels freezing after the warmth I just experienced, and I quickly move to grab my jacket and pull it on.
Lincoln is right behind me and squats down in front of me. He looks both cautious and concerned, but I’m not sure what I can say to explain how I’m feeling.
“Can you talk to me?” he asks softly.
I shake my head, feeling the beginnings of a panic attack setting in. Part of me wants to throw myself back into his arms, while the other part is horrified to realize that maybe I onlythinkI want that because I’ve been brainwashed to feel this way.
It’s the second part that wins out, and a new wave of dread crashes over me.
“Space! I need some space. Just for a minute,” I sputter, turning away from him as my body begins to shake.
He looks pained, but Lincoln simply nods and takes a few steps back.
“Why don’t you go wait for me by the entrance, and I’ll run these shovels back and then meet you over there? Then we can get you home.”
I nod. Home sounds good.
I don’t really notice my feet carrying me back over to the field entrance, but somehow I get there and turn my back to the fence as I sink down the wall. I see Lincoln in the middle of the field, and it looks like he’s erasing the cave village we made by whacking the various structures with a shovel. He’s always so thoughtful, making sure we aren’t leaving behind any obstacles for the athletes who’ll soon be back to use this field.
I try to focus on breathing and emptying my mind. I’ve learned if I try too hard to fight the panic, it fights back. I draw my knees up to my chest and lean my chin against them as I follow Lincoln with my eyes, trying to count his steps as he eventually makes his way over to the far side of the field to return the shovels to the shed.
Just when I think I’m gaining some control I’m startled by the sound of approaching footsteps. My head jerks toward the sound, and to my horror I see a group of three unfamiliar men walking through the entrance to the field. They’re less than ten feet away, and I can tell instantly at least two of them are alphas. My fight-flight-freeze instinct slams into me. It has me wanting to take off running in the opposite direction, but it also recognizes there’s no way to outrun these strangers. A small whimper escapes my throat unbidden and immediately catches the group’s attention.
They look surprised to see me here. A fair reaction.
“Hey,” the one closest to me says, sounding unsure as he takes a step toward me. “Are you okay?”
No, no, no, noooooo!I silently freak out. I was already teetering on the edge, but their unexpected appearance and unfamiliar scents are pushing me all the way off.
All three begin moving in closer to me, and before I can get the words out to ask them to back off, a loud siren shrieks out all around us. Some part of my brain screams at me to keep my wits about me, but the more dominant part wins the battle, and I succumb to a blind panic.
21
