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I don’t know how to respond to that. What if he leaves when I tell him about Maddie? Not a lot of men want to take care of a child that’s not theirs. When Travis left, I did hope that maybe one day I’d find someone to love the two of us again.
But after Adam, I didn’t introduce Maddie to anyone else. I was lucky all he did was pretend to be her daddy. What if the next one touched her? I could never live with that. I’ll kill anyone that touches my baby.
So as much as I like Hollis and feel like maybe he’s different, I just don’t know. My girls tell me that I don’t have to be so paranoid. He’s a good man, and it’s not like he’ll be babysitting Maddie by himself anytime soon. And I know that. But I don’t want Maddie to get attached. When I broke up with Adam, she spent months asking what she did wrong and if he was going to come back. I don’t want her to go through that again. And if it means I’ll be single till she leaves for college? Then that’s what I’ll do.
“You don’t have to pick me up and take me to work to get to know me.”
“True, cupcake. But let me tell you something—I’ve never wanted to take it past a night of fun before. You make me want to know you. I want to spend time with you, even if it’s just driving to work.”
“Getting to know me might make you turn tail and run.”
Hollis
Why would she say that? What happened to my girl to make her think she’s not worth it? She’s beautiful. Every curve she has makes me want to run my hands all over them. And for once, it’s not just a sexual attraction for me. I want to know her. What makes her smile. What her dreams are. Thank god my club brothers can’t hear what’s going on in my head. It feels like she’s hiding something, though. There’s a sadness in her eyes even when she’s smiling. I’m tempted to text Charmaine and ask her. But I think this is something Lila needs to tell me herself. So I’m going to try and be as patient as I can.
“So what do you say?”
At this point I’m practically begging her.
“Maybe. Let me see if I can get my shit together.”
“Okay, cupcake.” I lean over the bar and kiss her. That gets me a smile. Who knew a simple smile could make you feel like you won the lottery?
I take a look around. The bachelor parties are getting rowdier. I’m glad we’re here so they can’t mess with my girl. A few guys have tried, but all it’s taken is a look from me or one of my brothers to make them stop.
It’s finally last call and apparently the drunk asses don’t like it. Well tough shit. It looks like Matt the bouncer might need some help getting the bachelor parties out of here.
I’ve watched Lila work all night and I admire the way she handles the guys at the bar. I can see that she’s tough but fair, and she doesn’t take shit from any of them.
The manager on duty, Janet, lets us stay after we help get all the other patrons out. I wait with my brothers for Lila to finish talking to Janet about quitting. I know it’s shitty to ask Lila to quit with no notice and leave them hanging. If they really need a temporary bartender, I’m sure we can help them. I refuse to have her working here another night.
“Okay, I’m ready to go,” Lila says as she walks up to me.
“Everything okay?” I ask as I take her hand.
“Yeah, Janet said she was surprised I lasted this long.” She laughs.
I laugh with her as I pull her closer to me. “Thank you for doing this. I don’t like that you had to work here.”
She looks down, and now I know there’s a reason for it.
“What made you stay? Are you okay?” I ask.
“I-I’m fine. I just have bills. And this was the best way for me to make the money I need.”
“If it’s the money, I can give you money.”
“NO!” She gasps. “I mean no, thank you. I appreciate the gesture, but I can do this.”
“I didn’t mean it like you couldn’t, I just want to help you.”
I wish she would open up to me. Maybe she doesn’t feel what I do? And when did I start having feelings? What the fuck is going on?
“Look, I appreciate that you want to help me. But I don’t need a handout.”
I take a deep breath. She’s not going to make this easy. So I stay quiet and put my arm around her shoulders.
“Let’s get going.” When we get to my bike, I pull out the helmet I bought for her.
