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As if the thoughthad summoned him, Amber’s phone started to ring. She saw Joseph’s name on thedisplay and hurriedly got up.
“I have to takethis,” she said, heading away from the others so that she could talk. Shewondered if they would even notice. She perched by one of the department’swindows, looking out over Westford. She could see a group of journalists below.Maybe Joseph would have been among them if she’d told him about this caseearlier. Then again, did Amber really want the distraction of her boyfriendthere with her?
“Hey, Joseph,”Amber said, once she’d settled into position.
“Amber, I wasgetting worried,” Joseph said. “All I’ve had from you in the last day is onemessage saying that you were heading to someplace in Oregon.”
That caught Amberby surprise. She’d been wondering pretty much the same thing. She’d beengetting worried because she hadn’t heard from Joseph, because he hadn’t called.She hadn’t considered that he might be waiting for her to call at the same timeshe was.
Amber sighed. “Iknow, Joseph, and I’m sorry. It’s just that things have been really hectichere. I’m working on a case.”
“What kind ofcase?” Joseph asked. “There wasn’t a lot of detail in your message.”
Was that himasking as a concerned boyfriend or as a reporter fishing for information?
“It’s a murderinvestigation,” Amber said. “Someone’s been killing people who worked on amotor project, the WM 120. We still don’t know who’s behind it.”
There was a pauseon the other end of the line. “Are you okay?” Joseph asked at last. “It soundslike a dangerous situation.”
“I’m fine,” Ambersaid. “We’re being careful. But I really need to focus on this right now,Joseph.”
“You say you’rebeing careful, but how careful is it possible to be, with a murderer somewhereout there? I’ve covered your cases before, Amber. You’ve been in so much dangerin some of them. You’ve almost died before.”
This was too closeto the conversation they’d had before, in the restaurant.
“I know, Joseph,”Amber said, her voice growing tense. “But I can’t just stop doing my jobbecause there’s a risk involved. I’m an FBI agent, it’s what I do.”
“I know, I know,”Joseph said, his voice calming slightly. “I just worry about you, Amber. Youmean everything to me.”
Amber felt herheart flutter at his words, but the feeling was quickly replaced by guilt,because she wasn’t sure that she could say the same thing back. She couldn’thelp but think about Simon and Francesca, just a little ways away, theirgrowing attraction, and her feelings of jealousy. Was she being unfair toJoseph, dating him while she was having these thoughts about someone else?
They were justthoughts, though. Thoughts didn’t count. She hadn’t done anything about them,wouldn’t do anything about them.
“I’m not takingany unnecessary risks. But this is what I do, you know that. I can’t just sitback and not help catch a killer. I’m trained for this.”
“You were trainedas a puzzle editor before this,” Joseph pointed out. “You were a lot saferthen. And you were the best at it.”
“So what? You wantme to go back to a life of making up puzzles for people?”
Amber couldn’thelp a slightly harsh note at that. After everything she’d done, could her oldlife ever seem like enough again?
“I saw you whenyou were competing in that puzzle competition,” Joseph said. “You were sohappy, so excited. You were in your element. And I was so proud of you. I justworry that this job is too dangerous for you.”
Amber felt a pangof guilt. Joseph was right in one way, of course. She had been happy when she’dbeen competing. There had been a challenge there and it had felt good to beateveryone else. But she also couldn’t deny the thrill that came with catching akiller, the satisfaction of bringing justice to the victims and their families.That work felt as though it mattered, as though she was making a realdifference.
“I could talk toHarry,” Joseph said, mentioning Amber’s former boss, the editor of theWashingtonNews. “My guess is that he’d love to have you start producing some puzzlepages again now that your name is out there.”
Amber wasn’t surewhat to say to that. Did Joseph really think that she would just go back to howthings had been? Her boss’s attitude had been at least a part of why she quit.
“Joseph, imagineif I told you that being a journalist wasn’t a good idea,” Amber said. “Thatyou could upset the wrong people with your stories, maybe make dangerousenemies. Imagine if I told you that you had to stop. Imagine if I talked tosomeone about getting you a job in another field.”
“That isn’t thesame,” Joseph said. “You’re going up against killers, not putting togetherstories about politicians. I just worry about you getting hurt.”
“And I’m choosingto do it. I’m doing it because I can make a difference. Look, I… I’ll becareful, Joseph,” she said, trying to reassure him. She didn’t want him toworry, after all. “I promise. And I’ll call you as soon as I have any news.”
“Okay,” Josephsaid, his voice making it clear that Amber hadn’t really alleviated any of hisconcerns.
Amber hung up. Sheneeded to get back to the case. More than that, she wasgratefulto getback to the case if it meant she didn’t have to argue with Joseph anymore. Whenshe walked over, Simon and Francesca were still working, although neither ofthem looked like they were getting very far.
