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“That’s right, I need you to squeeze your hand as hard as you can. I need to see how much movement you have in your wrist,” she says a little too loudly.
I look at her questioningly. She just shakes her head no. I hold onto whatever she gave me.
“Okay, I’m all done patching you up. You can go to school, but you need to keep it light. No hard exercise, no running around, no heavy lifting, et cetera. You won’t be able to use that hand to carry anything, and you’ll have to figure out a way to get around your classes because of your ribs. You have a rib brace on right now. It can’t get wet, so you’ll have to take it off to shower. Try to get it as tight as you can when you put it back on.”
I nod my head at her and try to get up. I wince, tearing up, and fall back down, also causing more pain. I get back up, expecting the pain this time.
Blinking back the tears that are trying to fall before my mother can see, I head upstairs to my bed. As soon as I get to my bedroom, I look at what the doctor gave me. It’s a pill bottle. I’m unsure what they are, but I don’t have the energy to care right now. I walk over to my secret hiding spot and put them in there now and then head to bed. When I’m able to lie down safely, I pass out immediately.
* * *
Waking up, I feel groggy and my head is pounding. I freak out for a split second and then it comes back in a flash. All the abuse. Not just from last night, all of it since Dad left.
I give myself another minute, and then I’m getting up for the day. I have no idea what time it is, but I know I have to get up, no matter the time. I need to get up to make food, do chores, or get to school. Any or all of the above are needed.
I get up slowly, wincing and breathing heavily through the sharp pain in my ribs. Mother focused most of her attention there last night, and I know my ribs and stomach are going to be black and blue. I take the few steps to the bathroom and go through my normal routine, except I add the brace into the routine now, unsure of how long I’m going to need it.
Taking it off makes it hurt more than I thought it would. I bite my cheek to keep from screaming from the excruciating pain. The water pouring down on all of the black and blue bruises makes them feel ten times worse than when I was just walking around.
Ever since the last time she had to call the doctor, she had stopped being this violent.
Sighing, I get ready as fast as I can and head downstairs, finally checking the clock and realizing it’s five a.m. I have a whole hour before I normally wake up. I want to get a head start on the day. I need to see how much movement I have and how long it’s going to take me to get to school.
I make my mother breakfast—some eggs and bacon, something that she can heat up—and head out. It’s chilly since it’s so early in the morning, so I grab a jacket before I leave the house. This also gives me something to use to cover up the bruises without being suspicious, but I welcome the cold. It means I’m alive and I can feel.
I’m thankful that my body woke me up so much earlier. I don’t know if I’ll make it to school even with this extra time. Breathing takes so much energy, and I have so far to walk. My shoulders are pulsing from the weight of my backpack on them.
I consider turning back and going home, but I’d rather be late to school than deal with Mother. Looking forward again, I sigh and continue walking.
CHAPTER10
LUCA
Walkingup to the school grounds, I sense it. It’s like a shiver that goes through my whole body. There is something different in the air.
I can’t put my finger on what exactlyitis. It’s not a good feeling, though. I glance at the boys, and they are lost in conversation with each other. As we walk into the school, I pinpointit.
Paisley.
I don’t know how I know. I can’t even put a word on the feeling itself, but I knowsomethingis wrong with her. I tug on the closest shirt to me, needing someone’s attention. Kade turns around, and I start signing as fast as I can.
“Something is wrong with Paisley. I don’t know how I know, but I do. We need to find her. Now.”
“Okay, okay, calm down. We can’t help her if we are upset and running around without a plan. Let’s tell the rest of the guys first. That way we can brainstorm what to do,”Kade signs.
I zone out, letting Kade tell them what I told him, and let them come up with a plan. I just get this feeling of pain and exhaustion.
Atlas yanks on my hand and pulls me out of my head, signing the plan to me, “We are going to go to our first period and see if she is there. If she isn’t in class, all we can do is wait for her there. I’ll talk to her in our second period if she shows then, since we are by ourselves. If she won’t talk to me then, we can sit with her at lunch and figure out what is going on.”
I want to run to the class. I’m starting to sweat, but I know I have to remain calm and collected. If something is truly wrong with Paisley, then I don’t want to make matters worse by being upset around her. We get through the door, and she isn’t there.
WHERE IS SHE?!
I’m about ready to run outside of the classroom and look for her, but as soon as I turn around, she walks through the door right before the bell rings. I breathe a little better until I see how slowly she is moving to her seat. I keep my eyes trained on her until she sits down.
While I look over at my brothers, my hands start moving fast. “What do you think happened?”
“I don’t know, but like Atlas said before, he will talk to her in second period, if she shows. Try not to dwell on it too much. She is here, and that’s what you were worried about, right?” Kade signs, shrugging.
