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“I am. I am … happy.” I press my lips together. “I’m so happy for you.”
Aurora shook her head. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”
Pressing my lips together, I reach into my jeans pocket and pull out my cell phone. Andrei hadn’t taken it off me, even as we were on the plane heading here.
“Bethany sent me this,” I said.
My sister hadn’t stopped trying to drive a wedge between me and Andrei. I believed him, at least I think I did, that he wasn’t having an affair, but now I see this. It’s a picture of them, and I don’t know when it was taken, it looks like they’re in a nightclub of some kind. Either way, they are looking way too cozy.
Andrei hasn’t taken me to any clubs, and certainly no fancy restaurants. We don’t … date. I can leave his penthouse apartment and go to the shelter. He won’t allow me to see Nathan. That he has banned, and then of course, there are the few times I can have dinner with Aurora. There’s no real life for me, though. I’m constantly going through the motions until Andrei arrives home. That’s it.
That is the extent of my life—reading books, cooking, and just waiting. I’m bored, I’m lonely, and I had thought things would change, but Andrei is cold. He’s not mine.
“Bethany is a spiteful woman,” Aurora said. “I know she’s your sister and I’m sorry about that.”
I shrugged. “Bethany has always been this way. Trust me, I’m used to it.” I reach for the coffee mug, and bring it to my lips.
“Adelaide, talk to me.”
“Andrei told me he is not having an affair.” I don’t tell her that was weeks ago. “I trust him.”
“But?”
“Even if he’s not having an affair, and this was taken some time ago, it means that he was at least happy with her. Didn’t you see that?”
Is that what bothers me more? Andrei being happier with my sister? I’m the second choice. That’s who I am. It’s all I’ve ever been.
Aurora shook her head. “Stop it. No, I don’t believe that for a second.”
“Pictures don’t lie,” I said.
My words have Aurora laughing so hard. “You’re kidding, right?”
“They don’t.”
“Adelaide, I know you’re young.”
I’m twenty-one years old. Bethany is nearly thirty. My mother was quite surprised when she had me. I’ve always been a lot older than my years, though.
“What does my age have to do with anything?”
“Some photos are designed to be deceptive. You have no idea when this was taken or why it was taken. It looks like a professional shot. It could have done the rounds for all those media papers and stuff. Trust me when I say this, Andrei never looked as happy as he does with you.”
“You saw them together as a couple?”
Aurora nodded.
“Did Andrei smile?”
“From time to time.”
“Did he listen to Bethany?”
“Adelaide, you’ve got to stop.”
I put my coffee down and stood up. “I’m sorry, but I need some air.” I smiled at her. It was forced and I felt my eyes fill with tears, but I bat them down, refusing to allow them to leave. I’m not going to cry over him or this situation again.
Bethany was doing exactly what she set out to do and I knew that. She wanted to drive a wedge between me and Andrei. The sex was good. I enjoyed being with him, but I always felt like he was bored … I duck my head as I ignore one of the soldiers. I don’t know how Aurora lives with guns constantly on display. They still terrify me.
I find a door leading onto the back porch that overlooks the garden, and as I step outside, I take a deep breath. Leaning against the door, I suck in more oxygen, even as I feel my chest tighten. Anxiety threatens to claw its way up my body, but I fight it, using my breathing to ground me, to keep me from going over the edge that can suck me down too hard.
Opening my eyes, I look out over the garden. Aurora and Slavik’s home is beautiful. They have a special connection. What I’ve noticed in visiting them is that they don’t show it. Not in public, but I’ve seen them when they don’t realize anyone is watching, and I’ve heard them. Slavik is completely in love with Aurora. He would die for her. They are a love match. Even if they didn’t start that way, it’s what their marriage has become.
Andrei and I are not a love match. We’re a business contract. That’s why I know Andrei doesn’t really want me. The sex is good because he’s obligated to have sex with me. I overheard Ivan talking to Andrei one night a few weeks ago. He asked if I was pregnant yet, and Andrei said he expected it would happen soon.
