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A few more tears, another deep breath and a shared tired smile between my dad and me, and then he asked about Zac’s marriage. I told him everything that I knew about it as quickly as I could; I was worried about Zac waking up. I also told my dad about Zac’s Malcolm and when I said his name, he nodded and then kissed my hand. I’d just finished telling him about all the likenesses between Zac and me when a nurse came in. She said she needed to check my vitals, so my dad went back over to his chair.
My blood pressure was a little higher than the last time it was checked, but the nurse expressed no concern about it. I knew it was higher due to the conversation my dad and I had and it was also due to my noticing the slightly curled-up corners of Zac’s mouth right after the nurse came into my room. His eyes were still closed and he still appeared to be very much asleep, although I knew better. Now, I couldn’t help but wonder how long he’d been awake and how much he’d heard of the conversation between my dad and me. Going by those curled-up corners of his mouth, I could tell my lover liked what he heard.
My doctor released me from the hospital at ten this morning, but not before talking with me at length about the trauma I’d experienced yesterday—especially its lingering effects. I assured him that I was doing well. Then he asked me if I’d consider talking with a counselor. I said no. I didn’t need to. I just needed to go home. The last thing my doctor asked me to do was to contact him if I began feelingoffin the slightest and I told him that I would.
As Zac was walking my dad and me out to my dad’s car, he mentioned mine.
“We need to get it back to your house so if you don’t mind, I’m gonna go get your car, leave mine in the courthouse parking lot and drive yours,” he said.
“I appreciate it. After you get to my house, I’ll drive you back over to your car.”
“Or I can,” my dad said, smiling at Zac and me. I was in between them.
“Sure, Dad. Whatever is easiest for you guys.”
And here we all were with things growing more awkward by the second— because Zac knew that my dad knew about our relationship, but my dad wasn’t aware of that fact. He had no idea that Zac had overheard the majority of last night’s conversation, beginning with me admitting to Zac and I being in love.
Earlier this morning, when my dad had gone to the hospital cafeteria to get some coffee, Zac got up and gave me a good morning kiss, and then I asked him at which point he’d woken up and begun listening to the conversation with my dad. After he told me, he said he was touched by what he heard. He was also relieved about my dad’s acceptance of our relationship.
Zac and I both knew the time was coming for him and my dad to have their own little chat about matters and if I had to guess, it was going to happen after Zac brought my car back to my house. But my dad decided to talk to him as soon as the three of us made it to his car.
“I wanna clear the air with you,” he began, looking straight at Zac. “I know you overheard the conversation that Stevie and I had in the middle of the night about the affair that you two are having and I appreciate you acting like you were still asleep so we could have it. I know you could tell how difficult it was for my daughter to admit to her relationship with you.”
“Yes, sir, I could.”
“There was a time when I found myself in the very position that you’ve found yourself in, being in an unhappy marriage and then meeting someone whom your soul immediately recognizes, loves, and longs to be with. For me, that was Stevie’s mother. There’s much more to that story, and that’s something that you and I can talk more about at a later time. For now, I just wanted to let you know I’m not casting any stones at you or Stevie. She knows I’m not that kind of person and I want you to know it too. I always seek understanding in any situation, and in this case, I understand it well. I accept it too, Zac. I accept you. You’re a really good man. You’re just in a catch-22 like I was. But have faith, son. If this that you have with Stevie is meant to be, then a door will open for you two to be together.”
Zac looked over at me and his eyes were filled with tears like mine and my dad’s. When he turned back to face my dad, Zac thanked him for the words that he’d spoken and then held out his hand. My dad didn’t shake it, though. He hugged Zac instead. While he was embracing him, I saw the pastor side of my dad but also the father—and Zac received his heartfelt affection with open arms.
My dad and I left to go to my house as Zac headed to the Dallas Courthouse parking lot to get my car. Before we parted ways though, Zac stepped up to me and pulled me into his arms. It felt so good to be in them again and feel Zac’s warm and secure strength. I wondered if he was going to kiss me goodbye since my dad was sitting in his driver’s seat by that point. He did kiss me but it was on my forehead, and I smiled to myself when he did it. Zac was being respectful of my dad in his own way and I appreciated it more than he knew.
On the way to my house, I asked my dad how he’d figured out Zac was married.
“The base of his left ring finger is smaller than the rest of it, and also slightly lighter than his entire hand,” he said, glancing over at me.
“I hadn’t even noticed that, but I should’ve known you would.”
“I didn’t notice it right away. What made me take a closer look at Zac was when he began sharing more detail about his family with me, after you fell asleep. He told me all about his son and also his parents. He never mentioned a wife, but he did pause mid-sentence a few times while he was talking to me and then changed the subject. It was as if he caught himself on the verge of saying something that he didn’t want me to know. By then, I sensed there was a wife in the picture so I took a good look at Zac’s left hand on one of the many occasions when he looked over at you in your hospital bed.”
“You’re not only a Jesus expert. You’re apeopleexpert.”
“I don’t think I’m either. I’ve just lived a long time and read the bible inside and out too many times to count. At my church, I’ve also counseled many married couples, as well as individuals in the same situation as you and Zac.”
“I have no doubt that you’ve seen and heard it all.”
“About the time that I think I have, I always hear something new that shocks me. The latest is what you told me about Zac’s wife and how she treats Zac and also their son. I can’t imagine living like that. I do understand Zac’s reasoning, though, and I respect him for it.”
“So do I.”
“I’m gonna keep Zac and Malcolm in my prayers.”
“Thank you, Dad.”
He smiled at me, then reached over and gave my hand a gentle squeeze. “I wanna tell you again how thankful I am that you survived yesterday. What happened still doesn’t feel real to me.”
“It does to me.”
“Yet you seem so indifferent about it. I can’t get over how composed you are.”
