Brick tapped his fingers on the table. “This is hard for me to say. But I only ever want what’s best for her.”
“I know.” Xavier gave him a nod. “I can tell you do. And she’s smiling so much more lately. That’s down to you.”
“She hasn’t been these past couple of days. She’s been upset. Quiet. Withdrawn.”
“Why?” Had Brick done something to hurt her? He’d kill him.
“Because of you.”
Xavier sat back, shock filling him. “What? How? I haven’t seen her since that last day I came over.”
“When you dropped that bombshell about leaving.”
Xavier sucked in a breath.
“It’s because of her, isn’t it? That you’re going to leave. You love her, don’t you?”
Shit. Fuck.
What to say?
Swallowing heavily, Xavier nodded. “I do. But you don’t need to worry I’m going to steal her away from you. I want her to be happy.”
“Who said you could steal her away if you wanted to?” Brick looked amused rather than angry. “I’m not worried, which is surprising considering my ex cheated on me with my accountant for years.”
“I’m sorry, man. But that’s not who Juliet is. Or me.”
“Juliet doesn’t have a disloyal bone in her body,” Brick agreed.
“Who’s with her now?”
“Elias and Sterling. They’re watching a movie.”
“A zombie movie?” Xavier guessed.
Brick grimaced. “I think so.”
“She has a love-hate relationship with them.”
“She worries about them eating her brains, yet she keeps wanting to watch movies about them.”
“Crazy, huh?”
They shared a knowing look. Then Xavier looked away, uncomfortable. “I can’t stay here and see her with you. I don’t think I’m strong enough to do that.”
“I get it. If things were reversed, I’d feel the same. I married my ex because she was safe, you know?”
“Safe?”
“I cared about her, but I didn’t love her. Loving someone is . . .”
“Like throwing yourself into the middle of a tornado and hoping you survive?” Xavier said dryly.
“Something like that. It’s being vulnerable and shit. Stuff I don’t do well. I lost people I cared about when I was in the marines, I didn’t want to go through that again. When Linda, my ex, left, I was upset over the humiliation. She cheated on me for years and I had no idea. I was a failure who couldn’t hold onto my business. I’ve always put myself first. I was driven to build my business. I’m set in my fucking ways. I had all these ideas about Juliet before I even met her based on how much money she had. Yeah, all my life I’ve put myself first. That’s been my problem. Why did you never make a move on her?”
“Because I was stupid,” he said honestly. “When I first moved back here, I was a mess. My mind was in a dark place. I didn’t want a relationship. When I had to, I’d go to the club and scene with a sub. I like to be in complete control. That need grew after . . . after the incident that brought me back to Wishingbone. I didn’t even realize I have feelings for her until recently. And I never thought I deserved her. Figured she needed someone who would give her gentleness, who would let her be in control, let her call all the shots.”
Brick snorted. “She doesn’t need that. She feels better when she has rules and boundaries.”