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I swear if he doesn’t leave soon, I will kick his arse. Of course she’ll be okay. Sure, I’m pissed off, but I’ve never abused a woman before and I’m certainly not about to start now. She has far more reason to fear Lucas than me. He’s the one who broke her heart. A fact she’s clearly forgotten in the wake of their reunion this evening.
When Lainey squeezes his hand and nods, my temper reaches boiling point, and when Lucas walks past me, I make sure I shoulder him. Hard.
“Ben!” Lainey reprimands.
“It’s fine,” Lucas says to her before he turns back to look at me. “I know nothing I say will make us square, but for what it’s worth, I’m sorry you were hurt by what happened.”
He’s got to be kidding. “You’re right. It doesn’t make us square. Nothing ever will. Amber’s the one girl I loved. The only girl I’ve ever loved.”
Lucas’s gaze flies from Lainey to me, and then back to Lainey. “I’ll be inside if you need me,” he says to her.
“She won’t,” I say firmly.
Instead of taking me at my word, however, he continues to look at Lainey. When I finally turn back to look at her, she’s wearing the same expression she wore earlier tonight in my arms, before the party—the one full of hurt. Her eyes meet mine for just a second and I see the flash of pain in them before she looks back at Lucas.
“Thanks. For everything,” she says to him.
“We’ll talk soon, okay?”
“Yes.”
“You’ll talk soon?” I ask her, incredulous, before Lucas is out of earshot. “Are the two of you friends now?”
Her gaze shifts from Lucas to me. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“So the fact he ripped your heart apart no longer matters to you? It’s just water under the bridge?”
She sighs, albeit shakily. “Yes, Ben, it is. I’ve come to terms with what happened. I’m over it.”
I shake my head. “Unbelievable. I thought we understood each other. I thought I understood you. Clearly, I don’t.”
“No. Clearly, you don’t. Which is why, obviously, we can’t continue this thing between us.”
Even though I was expecting the words—I’d been right there when she said as much to Lucas—they still leave a gaping hole in my chest.
“Yeah,” I agree, trying not to think about how much I’m losing right now. I shove my hands in my pockets, so I don’t reach for her and try to persuade both of us to keep doing something that was a mistake to start in the first place. “We obviously can’t.”
“I guess that’s all that’s left to say, then.”
She starts to walk past me, but I reach out and take hold of her arm, stopping her. “Where are you going?”
“Inside.”
“Back to him?”
“No, just inside. It’s cold out here.”
In the tight little outfit she’s wearing, I’m not surprised. Stupidly, I’d actually thought she wore it for me when I first saw her in it. But the way she zoned out in my arms before we’d even left her place proved me wrong. One minute she was as desperate for me as I was for her, and the next she was a million miles away, her face looking just like it did that night eight months ago, when her heart had just been broken. It could only have been Lucas she was thinking about. And Lucas she wore it for.
Despite the stupid stab of envy I feel that she dressed up for Lucas, I start taking off my jacket for her. Before it’s off, she puts a hand up to stop me.
“Don’t. I’m okay, but I really do want to get out of the cold.”
“I need to talk to you.”
Our sexual relationship might be over, but she’s still my friend. I owe her an apology for how I acted earlier.
“I’m not sure there’s anything left to say, Ben.”
