Page 61 of Let Me Be the One


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Duncan releases Cass and steps in between us, but Cass pushes him to the side and walks towards me, hand on her hip and glaring. “You self-righteous prick! You ruined her night first.”

The knot that has been wedged in my gut since I saw Cass walking towards me without Lainey doubles in size.

“What are you talking about?”

I know. Of course I know. Yet I ask anyway. And when I see Cass’s gaze slide to where Bec, the woman I’ve been chatting up all night, is standing at the bar, I deflate. The memory of how stupid I’ve been tonight is enough to pull the plug on the anger I feel towards Cass and Duncan. I can no longer focus on it, and the guilt I’d been feeling earlier comes back full force—like a bat swinging against my stomach. Repeatedly.

I’ve been trying to prove a point to Seb and to myself after last night’s disaster. Last night, I started kissing this woman I’d been flirting with for most of the night and was consumed with guilt. I couldn’t stop thinking about Lainey. Nor could I stop unfavourably comparing the woman I was with to Lainey. And did I go home with the woman? No. I rejected the offer of no-strings sex, went home alone, and beat off while thinking about Lainey and how hot she is when she’s riding me as if there’s no tomorrow.

Seb messaged me today with some crap about how I’m so whipped, telling me he’s the last bachelor standing—that he should win some kind of prize for it. I should have told him to go to hell. Instead, I came out tonight, and when I saw Bec and her friend, I was more determined than ever to pick up. Especially when the alternative was panting after Lainey in her super short skirt and tight tank top. We’re supposed to be moving on from that night and walking around with an erection because I can’t stop lusting after her wasn’t going to help any.

I could see Lainey getting a little upset with the constant breaks in our pool game, and I’d ignored her feelings, just like Cass had by inviting Amber and Lucas to her party.

I think that officially makes me an arsehole. I’ve never tried to pretend I’m anything else with women, but Lainey is a friend, and my friends matter to me. I should have put her feelings first.

“How long ago did she leave?” I ask.

Cass looks towards the door and then back at me. “She’s waiting for a taxi.”

“What? Outside?”

“Yes. I didn’t want to leave her, but she insisted she wanted to be by herself.”

I’ve already turned around to go after Lainey when Cass grabs my elbow to stop me. “She said she wanted to be alone.”

“Of course she did. We’re both shitty friends. Why would she want to be around either one of us?”

Cass flinches and Duncan looks set to kill me, but they can both lay into me later. I must talk to Lainey before she leaves. I owe her a huge fucking apology. And after that... I don’t know.

Nothing was supposed to change between me and Lainey, but it has. For both of us. What I did tonight, flirting with some woman right under Lainey’s nose while we were supposed to be hanging out, that’s proof right there that everything is different. Because I never would have done that to Lainey before we had sex. I wouldn’t have put her in a position where she felt like a third wheel with me and Seb. No, I would have happily played pool with her, then waited until she was busy or went to the bar before asking Bec for her number. Instead, I shoved my flirting down Lainey’s throat and practically ignored her because I was desperate to prove my point and send a message.

I’m a tool.

As I push through the doors of the bar, I’m aware of Bec’s eyes on me, but I’m in too much of a rush to stop and give her any explanation.

I spot Lainey straight away, hugging herself as she sits on the curb. It’s cool for February, but not cold when compared to a winter night in Melbourne. She’s wearing a purple tank top that shows off her cleavage perfectly, and a white skirt with a slit up the side that shows off her tanned and fabulous legs. When she hears the double doors slam behind me, she looks over her shoulder at me before turning back to face the darkness once more.

“Hey,” I say as I sit on the curb next to her. My whole body tightens just from the scent of her. I’m close enough to pin her under me and kiss her, and just the thought is enough to arouse me.

“Sorry I bailed,” she says.

“I was an arsehole, so I don’t blame you.”

“You’re not the only reason I’m leaving.” She sighs. “But even if you were, nothing was supposed to change between us, right? You weren’t doing anything wrong.”

“I was ignoring you, Lainey.”

Her head whips around, so she’s looking at me. “You were trying to pick up. You’ve done that before when we’re out.”

“But I’ve never shoved it in your face like that before.”

In the moonlight, I can see the tears shimmering in her eyes. “Were you deliberately trying to hurt me?”

“No. God no. I was trying to prove to Seb that sleeping with you hadn’t changed anything for me.”

“Oh. Great. Well, I guess you proved it, then,” she says, looking down at the sea of black asphalt in front of us.

“The only thing I proved is that I’m an idiot.” I put my finger under her chin and wait for her gaze to climb back to mine. “Because things are different, aren’t they?”

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