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“Stop fucking other girls and I might,” I say, pulling back and turning over. I knew we would be toxic. That we’d pull and push one another until one of us finally loses control.
I hear him chuckle right before my mind drifts.
* * *
Instead of showing everyone up, I get in Branson’s Jeep as our crew packs up all our things. I am capable but if I’m going to live the luxury life, I might as well own it.
Branson climbs in, putting his sunglasses on. How does he still look so beautiful? I need a shower ASAP and my bed. And a book, because I haven’t read in several days now. It is despicable.
Branson’s hand reaches across the console, snatching mine. Looking over, he makes eye contact as his lips touch my knuckles. I try not to blush, but there is no controlling it when his eyes penetrate me with such longing. When it is just him and I, he is sweet. To everyone else, he is a jerk—and that, apparently, was my thing. I liked it. To be the only focus of someone. That has never happened.
“Tell me about your family,” I say.
One of his hands is on the steering wheel, the other is playing with my fingers.
“My dad owns the largest oil company in the world.A real prick most of the time. Never really been around. My sister is an art major. Already has her work hanging in museums overseas.” I knew the part about his dad, but I didn’t know his sister is a famous artist.
“That’s really amazing for Emerald. She’s extremely talented. What about you?”
He grins. “I’m more interested in you. You can google me; I can’t google you. Tell me your story, Darling. We have time.”
I swallow nervously. “I don’t want to talk about my life in front of a camera.”
He rips the desk camera from the dashboard. His phone and mine immediately go off. “Put it on silent. I’ll take the bitching later for it.”
Doing as he says, I switch my phone off.
“How do I know I can trust you?”
“How do you know you can’t?” he volleys back.
“You won’t even share anything with me.”
“My life is on display for the world to see. Give me pieces of you and I’ll give you pieces of me no one sees.” He looks over to me, honesty shown in his eyes. And deep inside, I know I can trust him. Like with Kalisha. I can feel it.
“Why do I have to give you my pieces first?”
“Because I’m greedy.” I laugh at his response. More out of nervousness than it being funny. Sighing, I lean my head against the headrest, looking out the window. If I am going to open up, it won’t be while looking at him.
And so, I tell him. How I was abandoned. How orphanages and group homes were my favorites. How I’ve stolen food and slept on benches. Everything. Until I get to that night. My body locks up as the words come numbly out of my mouth. It feels like I’m not here. Like I have drifted to a safe place. But I tell him and wait for the inevitable.
Chapter 10
@RayneMarshall: “They say memories were precious. Like little home movies we could replay to remember the good times. I wish I could burn mine.”
Past
Rayne
Have you ever had a bad feeling? A gut feeling that tells you to run. To escape. That’s how I felt tonight as I laid in bed. Not in mine but a borrowed one. One I could use if I was good. The feeling of running was one I never ignored. But I was tired. It was cold outside and sleeping on a bench didn’t sound appealing. I just wanted a warm, safe bed.
I laid on the scratchy sheets with a thin blanket, but at least it was warm. My room door creaked open, and my eyes flew open. This was expected to happen. It seemed like everywhere I went, it did. Foster brothers or dads feeling the need to take what they believed I owed them.
I wanted to move but it was already too late. A heavy body pressed on my back. The smell of beer and tobacco assaulted my nose. I tried to buck him off, but I was only fifteen. I was malnourished at that. My mind began to shut down when he ripped my shorts off. I was on a tropical island when he shoved my face into the pillow to smother any screams. He wouldn’t get that pleasure because I wasn’t here. I was soaking up the sun when he rolled a condom on. Safety of protecting his DNA. I was riding on my first boat when he entered my backside. I held on desperately to that vision of the boat when the pain of the untouched area was penetrated. And then I was numb when he finished.
I felt nothing as blood trickled out of my butt down my legs.
CPS came and found me the next morning. Informing me this home wasn’t going to work out for me. That I was too much trouble. I almost laughed at that but instead nodded. It was better this way. I should be thankful no one had taken my virginity by now. Oh, they touched, licked, and sampled, but they never took.
