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Rena’s eyes work over mine in the low light, but it’s the tremble of anticipation under my palm that has mestiffening.
I want to tell her she’s wrong. I want to tell her I’m sad for her, so fucking regretful that this is how sheis.
I start to step back but her hand finds my wrist. Circlingit.
It’s not like the party, or the school. It’s the two of us, a dark apartment, all these fucking words I can’t say and the ones Ihave.
I lift my other hand, brushing back a piece of hair from her face. I trace the line of her neck. Her lips part as her eyes fallclosed.
I understand her more than I did an hour ago, but part of me wants to goback.
The rest of me wants to godeeper.
My nose grazes the side of her throat. A breath falls from her lips, the lipstick faded, her pulse hammering under herskin.
I need tostop.
I skim my hands down her sides, from her ribs to her waist to her hips, smoothing down the dress that’s ridden up herthighs.
She hiccups a breath. “Wes...”
There’s so much in thatword.
Uncertainty.
Trust.
Longing.
It’s only my name, but there’s nothing she could say that would affect memore.
I’m steppingaway.
But my fingers toy with the edge of her skirt, fascinated by the contrast between the heavy fabric and her silky-smoothlegs.
Her gaze darkens onmine.
Like everything in life and nature, actions have consequences. If I do this for her, I’ll be the one paying theprice.
But I don’tstop.
I slide a finger under theedge.
15
Rena
I’ve always knownwhat’s happening in life. It’s made me feel in control of situations I found later I had no controlover.
I can pretend to be in control with my parents in a civilizedwar.
I can’t pretend I’m in control when Wes’s hips are spreading my thighs, the top button on his shirt undone, his tie hanging crooked around his tightneck.
Not when that cut jaw twitches, his hair falling carelessly over his face. When he looks at me as if I’m the only thing worth looking at in the entire building. The entirecity.
I shiver. Even though it’s not cold, goose bumps rise on my arms and legs as he strokes my skin under myskirt.
Higher.
