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“I’m going to find her and talk to her?”
“And say what? You can’t just show up without a plan.” Liam’s right. I need to think this through.
I drop my chin to my chest. I recognize this feeling. This is heartbreak. The feeling of drowning when you aren’t even in water. The sting of the pain in your lungs because there isn’t enough oxygen in the room to fill them. It’s a pain I’ve now felt twice in my life, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
“Parker!” Liam snaps me back to our conversation. “Get your head in the game. Focus. What are you going to say to her?”
“I’ve got tonight and tomorrow to figure it out.” Wednesday seems like forever away but I know it will come soon.
“You better figure this out if you don’t want to lose her. You need to do something so it’s clear how you feel about her.”
“Yeah,” I mumble. “Thanks, Liam.”
There isn’t anything I won’t do to fix this. I know what I want, and what I want is Livy.
Now the real question is… how am I going to get my girl back?
* * *
My Audi glides to a stop in front of Livy’s apartment. I’m immediately racing up the steps two at a time to get to her door. My mind is jumbled with all the things I want to say to her, questions I need answers to spinning through my mind.
“Livy?” I knock on her door, “Please answer the door if you are in there. We need to talk.” I pound on the door again. “Livy please, talk to me.”
I wait for the door to swing open, for her to answer so we can fix this. I kick myself, wishing that I had asked her for her entry code so I could go in and force her to talk to me. I know if we could just talk, I could make her see we belong together. I could fix whatever the hell it is that is upsetting her.
My palms press firmly on the door and I rest my forehead against the cool wood surface, listening for sounds that she’s there. Silence. I wait a few minutes, then call her name again through the door one last time. Nothing. I’m not giving up. I walk away, looking over my shoulder one last time at her door, then run down the stairs exiting her building. I will find her. I have to. I’m not losing Livy again.
Later that night, I’m standing in front of Breathe Yoga, waiting for Livy to finish her usual Wednesday night class. I’m taking a chance that she’s in there with the girls like she is every week. I tried Bloom after I left her apartment and neither Livy nor Ellie was there. I talked to Leah hoping for a clue where I could find her, but I came up short.
A group of people begin to filter out and I spot Ellie stepping out onto the sidewalk, her yoga mat under her arm, a duffle bag over her shoulder. She’s by herself. Shit! Where’s Livy?
I wait a second longer, hoping she appears somewhere in the small crowd of people behind Ellie. My heart sinks. There is no sign of her anywhere. Out of options, I approach Ellie, hoping she will talk to me. She spots me and her eyes narrow. She looks pissed. She is not going to make this easy on me from the looks of it.
She crosses her arms over her body and thankfully stops to talk to me.
“If you came to see Olivia, she’s not here.”
“Where is she, Ellie? I’ve been looking everywhere for her. I need to talk to her.”
“She’s not ready to talk to you, obviously. I told you to give her space.”
“This is ridiculous. I have no idea why she isn’t talking to me. How can I fix this if no one will tell me what the hell I did wrong? How is this fair?”
“Are you kidding me right now? What you did to her is so freaking far from fair. Seriously, Parker. You’re supposed to be a smart guy, do you really need me to tell you what you did?”
“Yes, I do.” The tone in my voice is one of pure frustration. This is going nowhere.
“I am so disappointed in you. I was always on your side, pushing for the two of you to be together. Team Parkey, remember? I can’t believe I had you so wrong,” Ellie snaps, digging through her bag to find her car keys. She rushes past me towards her car that is parked along the street.
“What are you talking about?” My head is spinning, I feel sick to my stomach. Why can’t someone tell me what the hell is going on? “I would never do anything to hurt her.” I turn to follow her down the sidewalk.
Ellie whips open her car door to her back seat, tossing her duffle bag and mat across the seat. She slams the car door and moves towards the driver’s door, opening it.
“You really are impossible, Parker. Do I need to spell it out for you?”
“Clearly you do, Ellie, because I have absolutely no clue what’s going on here. I dropped everything to drive here. I’ve been all over Reed Point looking for her. She won’t talk to me. I’m clearly getting nowhere with you. I’m trying here, but I don’t know what more I can do?”
“Well, how about for starters you stop kissing women in hotel lobbies.” With that, Ellie climbs into her car, slamming the door behind her. The engine roars to life and her cars pulls away from the curb into traffic.
