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“Let’s get one thing straight,” I whisper, my voice low. “The feelings I had for you back then were real, and so fucking consuming that being around you that last year was almost unbearable. But when you started dating… him, I hated it even more.”
Her stare softens, her body relaxing under my touch.
“Hannah, I could see the anger in his eyes. There was something about him that rubbed me the wrong way and I hate the fact that I was spot on, I fucking hate it. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy, and you told me he made you happy…”
Her breaths come in pants as I let out a breath, the weight of all those pent-up feelings falling to the ground, shattering at my feet. She says nothing and I know the way I’m looking at her right now is causing that wall she’s built to crumble just a little.
“Hannah.” My chin hits my chest, my eyes closing as my fingers grasp her just a little bit tighter. As if on instinct, her hands lightly flutter over my chest, her fingers curling into the fabric of my shirt as the sounds of the night surround us. “When you asked me if there was a reason for you to stay here, I knew you were looking for an excuse. I knew you wanted me to ask you to stay.”
She nods, her breath whispering against my neck.
“Why didn’t you?” Her voice cracks, her fingers gripping my shirt even tighter as I pull her flush against me.
“Because I couldn’t be the reason. I couldn’t be the one to hold you back.”
Her shuddering breath causes a new flood of tears to fall from her eyes. My thumbs catching them as they descend.
“But what I never expected was to be cut off completely,” I admit.
Her choked sob breaks through her tough exterior as I throw all my hesitations out the window and wrap my arms around her, sighing when she does the same.
“I thought you hated me,” she admits, the words like sandpaper against my skin because it’s the first time she’s actually admitted she ghosted me. “I thought since you hated Steven, you hated me for loving him.”
My fingers grip the back of her head as I pull her even closer to my chest and when my lips gently touch the top of her head, breathing in that familiar vanilla shampoo, I smile, knowing we’ll be okay.
“I never hated you, I just loved you so much that I knew I needed to let you go… even though I did try and find you after a few months.”
Her head snaps back, her eyes meeting mine as the weight on my chest returns.
“What?”
“I went to see your parents a few months after you left. I was angry that you blocked my number, angry that you didn’t say goodbye like you promised. I begged them to tell me where you went, but they refused.”
Hannah shakes her head, the realization finally sinking in that she was everything to me. “I didn’t know.”
I smile, gently letting my hands fall to her neck as my thumbs graze her jaw before I lean in and kiss her forehead. I knew touching her in any capacity would bring back a flood of emotions, but what I didn’t expect was for her to wrap herself around my heart so quickly. Before I can say anything else, she steps back, putting some much-needed space between us.
“Are you sure it’s okay for me to stay here?” she asks as I smile, taking her hand as I pick up her bags and lead us back into the house. I will protect her with every ounce of my being, no matter what.
“Hannah, you can stay here for as long as you want.”
As much as I probably should fight the feelings coursing through me, the ones that I thought I kept buried deep all these years, I know the longer I’m with her, the harder it will be to let her go again.
Hannah
“You’re lying,” I mutter through a mouthful of mac ‘n’ cheese.
Cash smirks, his eyes sparkling as we sit at his kitchen table.
“You’re telling me that Addison, the Addison that was type A all through school, is now dating someone that’s in college?” My eyes bug out as the words spill from my lips.
“I know. I felt the same way when Drew told me. Apparently, she really likes him, talks about him all the time, and it drives Drew crazy.” I chuckle softly as he takes another bite of his food and I just sit here and watch him. For the first time in five years, I feel this contentment wash over me. Seeing the Cash I remember, the way I always remembered him while I was stuck inside that hellhole is so incredible. I missed this version of him so fucking much.
“How did Max take that news?” Cash arches a brow and a laugh bubbles out of my chest. “What? That man has been in love with her for so long, you can’t tell me that you haven’t noticed.”
“I noticed,” he says through another mouthful of food.
“Don’t tell me he all of a sudden stopped making goo-goo eyes at her while I was away.”
