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Finn’s eyes had taken on a green cast throughout the whole conversation, but Aaron did not look away until finally, the other man’s shoulders relaxed. He let out a long sigh, then rubbed at his face.
“You’re hurting, and you want to do something about it. I get it. Go and burn some of that self-flagellating energy by practising digging us some latrines. Without a safe place to shit, things will devolve pretty quickly.”
Finn just nodded and turned on his heel and left.
Something needed to be done about that. While I’d managed to give him a reprieve from the waves of self-loathing, Finn wasn’t out of the woods yet. Going through the gate and setting up camp in the mine site had just re-started the spiral. I went to get to my feet, but Slade tugged me back down.
“Give him some space,” he said. “Aaron’s advice is a good one. We don’t even need latrines here, with the staff toilets, but there’s something to be said for just letting it all out in manual labour. He’s just gonna have to process this, and you being a spectator to his shame isn’t going to help.”
“But—”
“Slade’s right, Jules,” Aaron said. “He did send those blokes through here. They are getting treated like shit. He knows you love him and want him to be happy, but he’s trying to live with the unliveable. You try and get in close right now, you’re likely to be collateral damage, and then he’ll be even more ashamed. Anyway, we’ve got bigger problems to sort out here.”
“I assume that means me.”
Brandon walked in and hesitated for a moment, scanning the group before sitting down on an empty log. He didn’t look happy, his fingers going white.
I felt it, that same tugging sensation that made me want to chase after Finn urged me to get up and take my mate’s hand and smooth away the empty look on his face. Slade’s fingers tightened around mine, as if he felt the same but was resisting.
“Not you, but you’ve got to admit, dropping that bomb has to have some consequences,” Aaron said. “I dunno about everyone else here, but I feel like there’s been a breach of trust.” He held up a hand when Brandon started to speak, the other man falling silent, eyes on the ground. “You’ve explained, and I get it. You had your reasons, but both you and Sylvan have operated on a whole lot of covert information and chose not to share it with us. I think I speak for everyone when I say—what else are you hiding? What dangers do you know are coming that we don’t? How are you manoeuvring us into place to better meet your desired outcomes? You let Jules finally bond you, and then you chose to drop this bombshell?”
“I…I…”
I heard the pain in Brandon’s voice, something I’d never thought I’d see in a million years. I pulled free of Slade’s grip and ignored his grumbles as I got to my feet and went to Brandon’s side. Pulling him into a hug was not a pleasant experience. I felt his pain as if it was my own, but I was already full of a swirling mass of mistrust, betrayal, and frustration. For a moment, I just held him while he was stiff as a board within my grip, and felt like an overfilled cup, ready to spill messy emotions everywhere. Then he drew back.
Brandon stared at me for a moment, eyes wide, just looking at me before pulling my hand away and putting it down on the log. When he was freed from our mate bond, he turned to Aaron.
“You want some certainty about what’s about to happen. I understand that, I just can’t give it to you. My visions end here, just as Sylvan’s did when he came through the gate.” We all turned to look
at the black wolf, who shrugged.
“I saw that Jules and her pack were significant, and that you would come through the gate, and that was it,” he said with a shrug. “The rest was just waiting for that to happen.”
“You also want us to be working as a cohesive unit. That makes sense, but I don’t think we’re there yet. You’ll have to plan around a grieving process, I think, and allow people time to adjust.” Aaron paused and then went to continue, but Brandon just reached into the interior pocket of his jacket and pulled out a familiar book. It was the token he’d offered me during the petitioning process. He held it out to me, careful to make sure our fingers didn’t touch. That stung, that he would avoid contact, but I guess even I wouldn’t want to be swamped by the morass of emotion I was feeling right now.
“Read this. It might help,” he said, and then got to his feet. “You need intel? I had some visions of Leifgart. I’ll go and talk to your men now, see if I can help augment the map.”
And with that, he was gone.
Aaron shook his head. “Look, I get there’s stuff going on. I’m not immune, but for this to work, we’re all going to need to work as a team, and not so much in the fun way you were just enjoying. Find a way to get past all this…stuff.”
“The burly one is right,” Sylvan said. “A queen needs her courtiers. The strength of your pack is what saves the day. I’ve seen that over and over. Time to get your house in order.”
“I guess this means no Mate Torte for us,” Jack said drily as he watched Sylvan go.
“Jack, I’ll—” Hawk said.
“Let’s plan a celebration,” I said. “There’s a mess hall and a big kitchen full of supplies. Let’s make our last night at the mining site a memorable one.”
3
“Don’t beat it quite so hard. You’re folding oxygen into the mix, and if you smash it like that, you’ll destroy all those micro pockets of air you created,” Hawk said, peering over my shoulder at the bowl of whipped cream I was working on.
“I love it when the little woman gets all dominant,” Jack said, leaning over the stainless bench.
“Little woman?” Hawk’s eyes narrowed when he looked at his mate. “I bit you. If anyone’s the girl, it’s you.”
“Ooh, I like this new side to you,” Jack replied with a smile, but I think we both noticed the lazy catlike nature of it. What he said was only partly a joke.
