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It had been a terrible day. Her kids were jerks. Jason’s mom had gone off on her for being worried about him, and then Liv had been there when she got home.
It wasn’t that Violet wasn’t happy to see Liv. It was that she was upset and wanted to be alone. She didn’t want to have to explain the whole process of how she forgave Charlie. She didn’t want to have to think about Lauren, or her old apartment, or the guilt she still felt about how her friends had to treat them the last six years.
But Liv had kept pushing, and Violet had to tell her she needed alone time. She didn’t feel great about it, but her head was killing her, and she was close to losing it.
Pretending to be fine was her automatic, but she knew she couldn’t hold it up forever. And now she couldn’t deal with it anymore.
The moment they were gone, Violet’s roughly constructed walls shattered, and she wanted to cry. She pressed her hands against her eyes, which made her head swim, and she slowly sat on the ground.
In that moment, hardwoods were the greatest seat in the world.
“Violet," Charlie said, after a moment. He had been pissed when she got home, but now his voice was gentle. “Are you okay?”
“I’m sorry they came over,” she said, thickly. “I should have reached out,"
“No, I’m not mad at you. Besides, you had a busy day. You didn’t have time to reach out.”
“Then, why are you mad?” Violet asked, looking at him.
“It’s not anything you need to worry about. It’s not anything you did.”
“But-”
“No, we’re not worrying about me. I’m more worried about you. What happened today? How did your meeting go?”
“Horribly, like everything else today. Jason’s mom was offended I brought it up. She said I was judging her parenting style. I was trying to help. I hate it when people get so defensive.”
“I’m sorry, Violet. Some people don’t want help.”
“I know, but I had to document it anyways. If Jason keeps it up, it’s grounds for expulsion, and I don’t want that. I wanted her to listen to me, not get mad at me.”
“Maybe she will in time.”
“I hope," Violet said, sighing. “I wanted to vent and have a quiet night.”
“I didn’t invite them. Liv came over.”
“I figured. I know how you are about guests.”
“I mean, if they were here to check in on you, then it would have been fine. But Liv saw your apartment was being torn down, and she came to kill me if I hurt you.”
Violet frowned. “Why would she think you did anything? I miss calls all the time - especially when I’m teaching.”
“I don’t know, Violet," Charlie said. “But I can tell you’re thinking it’s somehow you’re fault when it’s not.”
Damn. He was right.
“Okay," Violet said, and she could feel herself becoming overwhelmed. She could feel the tears, and she could feel herself losing the battle to keep them at bay. One fell out of her wet eyes, and she wiped at it angrily.
It was one thing for her to have cried when her apartment flooded. That was bad, and none of its was her fault. She had gone to Liv and Lewis because she had no one else.
This time it was her job, the one she chose. She should be able to handle it. This was all usual teacher stuff.
Crying about it wasn’t going to solve anything. She was being weak, and she could hear her mom scoffing in her head, telling her she shouldn’t be upset about her own career. Especially not something as trivial as teaching.
But she couldn’t help it. She was upset. The tears had started, and they wouldn’t stop.
Violet wouldn’t have been mad if Charlie walked away, or if she was silent while she cried. That’s how Lewis was. He usually stood to the side whenever Violet had emotions. Violet didn’t think Charlie would be any different.
