Page 51 of Giving Up


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She huffs. “Everyone’s already talking about voting her for captain. Which makes Beth hate her, whichobviouslymakes me love her.”

I give her another look.

“And she’s so much fun,” she continues. After a brief pause of her debating to herself, she finally admits, “I can’t not help her.”

“Nope.”

“I have to.”

“Yup.”

“I hate you,” she concludes.

“You have no reason for that,” I smile.

“Yes, I do. You push me to be a good person. You’re so annoying. You can try to be bad all you want, you are good deep inside, Jamie Williams.”

How I wish I was.

I’m about to leave the locker room when Rose comes in. I haven’t spoken to her this week. She’s been skipping a lot of classes and has only been hanging out with Chris and Luke.

She’s not wearing the school uniform but she’s not wearing the lacrosse kit either. She’s just in a pair of large, washed-out jeans and a huge white hoodie. She’s actually wearing the hood up, which looks a bit weird in the locker room, and I know something is definitely wrong when I notice the thin-wire, round, golden glasses resting on her nose. She never wears them to school.

She leans against her locker but doesn’t proceed to get changed.

“Are you not getting changed?” I ask as I put my lacrosse stick against the locker next to hers. I stand in front of her, my arms crossed against my chest.

She shakes her head. “I’m not coming to practice. Just here to talk to Coach T.”

“We have a tournament in a week, Rose. You can’t skip practice. No one can.”

“How about you get off my back about practice. Just this once,” she huffs.

But I don’t. I’ve got my captain hat on, and Rose doesn’t get privileges just because we’rekind offriends under weird circumstances. I’m saying kind of because, if you’re not Luke or Chris, it’s hard to tell if you’re Rose’s friend or not.

“Coach is with the boys, how about you tell me whatever you were going to tell him?”

“I wasn’t gonna tell him anything. He’s the one who wants to talk to me.”

“What? About what?”

“Jamie,” she huffs again. She’s about to say something when Beth passes between Rose and I, bumping Rose’s arm with her shoulder on purpose. She winces at the not so gentle gesture.

“Oops,” Beth fakes regret. She adds a hand in front of her mouth for show.

“Fuck off, Beth,” Rose growls. “I’m not in the mood to deal with bitches today.”

Beth holds herself high as she tries to gain some height on Rose. Impossible may I say.

“No?” she pouts. “That’s weird, usually you’re always up for dealing with bitches. Boys, bitches, guys in relationships. Nothing bothers a slut like you.Usually. I guess today is your day off then.”

People have cleared the room now. It’s just the three of us. I’m pretty sure Rose is going to get mad. In my head, she’s going to shove Beth, maybe even slap her.

“Yeah, this slut needs a break. So run along,” Rose sighs as she goes back into her initial position, against her locker.

“How’s Jason?” Beth insists. “Did your druggie of a brother beat up any other of your boy toys? I bet there’s a long list to go through.”

“Is this why you’re such a bad cheerleader, Beth?” I interject. “Because you spend every practice bullying people in the locker room?”

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