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Only Jake’s beautiful beam can. Those dimples that would never fully come out at school when he would wear his mask and then would show themselves when we spent time together.
I never realized the privilege I had to have him open to me. Even the small bits he did. He never told me what really happened during his childhood, he never brought back the stuff he really didn’t want to. I could only make them up from his sleep-talking. But he still let me in like he never did anyone before.
And I’m aware I broke his heart. I’m aware I pushed him to give it to me and then crushed it in the palm of my hand. But he did the same, he only did it extremely slowly. At a pace where I wouldn’t realize until it was too late. At least I ripped the band-aid hard and fast.
It will only sting for a short time.
It doesn’t seem like it now, but we’ll both survive. And who knows, maybe one day we’ll find each other again. And maybe we can be friends.
But not now.
“I’m gonna have a shower,” I tell my mom as I head straight for the hallway leading to the bathroom.
“Watch your cast,” I hear her shout back from the kitchen.
I sigh and lock myself in the bathroom.
I cry in the shower, but I know these will be the last tears I ever shed for Jake and in some way, it’s kind of reassuring. To know that I will be capable of moving forward. To know that it’s officially over.
It’s stupid that it took this much for me to realize how incompatible we were. Jake turned me into the meekest girl on the planet before I found myself as a strong woman. In some ways I can thank him for that.
He helped me grow, he showed me what love is.
I’ll never forget that. I’ll never forget him.
Fuck, who am I kidding. I’llneverforget him.
I hear the door shutting as I attempt to dry my hair with one hand.
“Mom?” I shout.
No response. Weird.
Gripping the towel around me I walk to the kitchen and find a note on the counter.
Went to get your aloe vera drink from the store. Love you xoxo
I shake my head. She really didn’t have to. I guess I’ll be happy to have my favorite drink when she’s back.
I walk back to my room, leaving drops of water in my trail. I turn the light on, walk to my mirror and observe myself. My casted arm is all bruised and I hope these will fade away soon. I just want to forget about that night. At least the drugs they gave me are strong enough that I’m not feeling anything right now.
The light suddenly turns off, but it doesn’t surprise me. It’s either an old bulb or we haven’t paid for electricity. That happens more often than we care to admit.
“That’s annoying,” I mumble to myself.
I jump in fear when a hooded shadow appears behind me. I can see it in my mirror.
A hand gripping my wet hair ruthlessly makes me shriek in pain and my head is pulled back.
“Not as annoying as you thinking I’d let you get away from me,” Jake whispers behind me.
“Jake,” I whimper. “You can’t be here.” My working hand is holding my towel and I have to put my other one in my hair to attempt and ease the pull. “I was clear, we’re done.”
But shit, his presence behind me. His hot body against my almost naked one. His scent of pine and spice. That scent drives me absolutely insane.
And his voice is so dark. His vocal cords sound damaged, exactly like he should always have sounded. Unapologetically broken…sinful.
“You know what’s funny, Angel,” he growls in my ear. “That after everything, you still think you have a say in this relationship.”
