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“A round about reference to Judy Garland, I get it.” This wasn’t nearly as scandalous as an emotional reaction from Oz implied it would be. I was relieved.
“She’s the reason I was at the party last night, and never call her Judy, she hates it.”
Okay, industry friends, then. Or... frenemies? Judith was polite. Friendly.
“She’s my ex-wife,” Oz said.
What in the what? The emotions that washed over me were muddied and dense. It wasn’t like I thought Oz was a virginal saint, especially after last night, but we’d gone to a party at his ex-wife’s behest? I didn’t have a right to be jealous, but I was feeling something I didn’t like.
He glanced over and squeezed my leg. “I’m assuming you still want context?”
“Uh... duh?”
“Don’t make any assumptions until I get to the end.”
Too late. “No more than I already have.”
He shrugged. “Fair. All of us at Cord were also fucking around a lot. Pairing off. Grouping off. Even those of us who were together were openly sleeping with other people. It was all consensual. Not like what Violet has, because it wasn’t closed up all nice and neat. The fucking was fun, but the flexibility of loving multiple people was what I liked. I’m not monogamous.”
“You’re polyamorous.” Look at me, putting pieces together like a genius or something.
He nodded. “You deserve to know early on. I wasn’t planning to keep it from you, but I had hoped the circumstances would be a little less... crammed in the middle of everything else.”
This was where the jealousy should surge, wasn’t it? Why was I assured instead? “Are you seeing other people now?”
“No.”
“Will you want to?”
“Don’t know. You’ve raised the bar on what I like in a person. I’ve been hooked on you for a while now.”
I’d been drooling over him for ages, but that didn’t stop me from looking other places. Like Graham. Not that what I had with Graham was anything more than obsession at this point. I didn’t know what to do with this information. “Is that why you got divorced? Jealousy?”
“No.” Oz’s answer came without hesitation. “We had a difference in opinion about priorities, and in the end, she chose her career.”
Ouch. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.” He sounded like he meant it and radiated the same sincerity. “This isn’t a wicked ex story. I hated it at the time, but it’s been more than a decade and the distance has given me time to appreciate her friendship, without the romantic attachment.”
He made it sound simple. Except for the more than a decade part. I’d barely been legal for more than a decade. “Okay.”
“Okay?” Oz echoed. “Did I break you?” Teasing slid into his question.
The lighter tone helped unstick my brain. “It’s a lot to process, and it’s not about tech. Not directly, anyway. People are more complicated than software, and I don’t know what’s expected of me in this situation.”
“Don’t think about it like that. I’m telling you so that you know, not to trick you or see how you respond. Though, I obviously hope you’re okay with the entire thing.”
“I think I am.” Wasn’t I? Logically, these should be warning flags. My new boyfriend—I liked the sound of Oz is my boyfriend—had a past of fucking his co-workers and was still friends with his ex-wife. But I didn’t feel the issue. I wasn’t concerned about it meaning bad things for us.
Maybe he should be the one concerned, because now I was wondering more than ever if I could have at least one night with both him and Graham.
The tiny lines Oz traced along my thigh with his thumb were comforting. “I do the apprenticeships, I rent out the inexpensive housing, because when I was in my early twenties someone gave me an amazing chance, and others deserve the same,” he said. “You… You’re this brilliant mind capable of so much. If you were ten years older, you’d have been one of the original crew. I’m glad you weren’t, for your sake. You have access to so much more tech. Diversity. Freedom. But if anyone deserves a chance, it’s you.”
Thatstunned me to silence. And made me blush, I was sure. And was without a doubt, hotter than anything I’d ever fantasized about Oz saying to me.
“Besides,” he said. Your intelligence is really fucking sexy, and God I love fucking you.”
That was pretty hot too. “We have so much in common.”
