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“You can never tell what Gio wants. I don’t think he’s ever had a chance to decide what he wants for himself.”
“This is just going to keep getting more complicated, isn’t it?”
I kiss the top of her head. “All things get complicated before they work out perfectly. In the end, he’s going to make sure all your dreams come true. Mark my words.”
She looks up at me. “When did you become the wise one out of us?”
“I always have been.” I wink at her.
“I love your eyes this color.” She cups my face and looks into my eyes.
“What color are they?”
“Gray. You’re both too gorgeous not to procreate,” she breathes.
“The mother of our children will do right by us.”
“I’m never late. Do you think this was a sign?”
“A sign of what?”
“We should stop tempting fate. Maybe what we’re doing is wrong.”
“Tempting fate how? I don’t see anything wrong with who we are. Let me ask you a question.”
“Go on.”
“Are you happy?”
“Yes.”
“If we broke up and it was just you and Gio, would you still be happy?”
I hold my breath, knowing I’m taking a risk here. If she wants to break things off, it’s going to rip me in half. There’s still so much I’m waiting patiently for. She shifts in my arms and runs her hand through my hair, then moves her hand to scratch her fingers through my beard. Her eyes light up.
“Not as happy as I am now. I’d miss times like this.”
“Then we’re not hurting anyone. We belong together. This is our family.”
* * *
Gio
I stand out of sight, listening to every word they say. I rub at my bare chest, then place my hands in my sleep pants pockets as my thoughts race.
“All I want is to hold on to the family I have. You, Gio, Lizzy, Elijah, and Gwen. If I got a baby somewhere in there, life would be perfect, but I don’t think that’s for me. He doesn’t want that.”
“I think you’re wrong. At least, I hope you are. You want to keep your family. I want a family of my own. It’s our only wish. Something tells me they’ll be heard, and we’ll have it all.”
I inhale sharply and pull a hand down my face. A part of me longs to give Ny what she wants. I’d love to watch her swell with my baby.
Maybe in a few years this will be over, and I’ll come back to this. I didn’t know she would want this so badly. Or maybe I’ve always known and that’s the real reason I know I can’t fail.
My children will belong, and their mother will be respected. It’s all or nothing. Meaning, I’ll burn all this shit down and there will be no families if mine can’t live in peace.
I nod to myself and turn to head to start dinner. If it’s a baby Ny wants, against my better judgment, a baby she will get.
CHAPTER32
