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“Yaaa, I’m so excited, Daddy!” she shouted.
I yearned to reach out and put my hand on his thigh. That would have been brave but stupid, because he didn’t deserve it. The point was that he needed to show me some affection or at least, talk to me. He should have known that a relationship required compromise and understanding. Affection and love.
“Good, because I asked your grandparents to come. They are going to meet us there,” Sebastian said unexpectedly.
I glanced at him in shock, wondering if he was playing a game.
“What? You really asked my parents to be there?”
“Yes. I am not sure if your mother will show up, but your dad assured me he was coming,” he said, smiling.
I looked at him now. His eyes crinkled at the corners and his beauty took my breath away. Was he doing this as a way to apologize for the past few weeks? Well, it was hard to figure out what he was hoping to achieve with this.
“Great,” I muttered, unsure what else to say. He’d pulled the rug out from under me, but I didn’t have the headspace to deconstruct his motivations. Pedro was driving behind us and my appointment with doctor Stephens would happen later on. I was nervous and worried about what he was going to say.
Late at night, when I couldn’t sleep, I tried hard to get my memories to come back. I needed to remember everything from the moment I stepped on that yacht. I even looked at the pictures of us, over and over, but that proved futile.
Sebastian worked so hard and I didn’t ask questions. I didn’t want to know what he was doing. This world scared me to bits, but at some point, he no doubt would expect me to become Russina again.
Physically, though, I was doing great. Dr. Seamon said I responded better than most and she wasn’t needed any longer, unless I insisted on more sessions. In fact, she’d been considerably surprised at my lightning quick recovery.
“I want you to have fun today. I know I have been absent, but I want to make it up to you, Marinka,” he said, staring meaningfully at me when we stopped at the traffic lights.
“It’s a good start,” I muttered, not in the mood for a conversation. I just didn’t want to be disappointed when he wouldn’t deliver or when he had to disappear again. I was glad though that I’d have another opportunity to see my parents again, especially my father. In truth, I hoped my mother wouldn’t make an appearance.
Half an hour since we left the house, Sebastian parked the car and then took out the stroller. He strapped Lilly onto it because it would be a lot of walking. The place was huge, a farm expanded by adjacent fairgrounds sprawled across countless acres.
I was yet to take Lilly anywhere, frankly, and I hated having to ask Sebastian for permission, like a kid. This whole thing was a little absurd, at least the fact that I couldn’t go out with my own daughter at will because my husband would only allow it if we went to pre-determined locations with Pedro. There were so many nice places to visit in our state, but I was a prisoner in this life, never allowed to enjoy myself freely. All because of the conflicts Sebastian had with other mob families.
We came upon the petting zoo and Lilly went ballistic with exhilaration. After we scored a bunch of tokens, she went in with Sebastian to pet the goats and bunnies. My heart warmed at the sight of them together.
This was when I couldn’t make heads or tails of him. He was supposed to be this hard, indifferent mafia boss. I didn’t want to think about that but he killed people for a living, he must have, but none of this mattered when he was having fun and interacting with our daughter.
This whole situation was so surreal. We were parents of a precocious child, the role just sprung on me, but I already couldn’t imagine my life without her. We really did seem like the average family, except that Pedro was nearby, hovering in the background.
Lilly had a blast on the pony ride, and wanted to do it again. Once she’d had enough, she demanded food—all junk, of course. We settled on funnel cakes and ice cream, but Sebastian ended up eating most of it.
“Come on, have some,” he said, offering me a portion of funnel cake. “I would like you put on some weight.” Then he leaned down and whispered, “You’re still the most beautiful woman in this whole place, and I can’t stand when other men look at what’s mine.”
“I don’t belong to you, Sebastian,” I reminded him in a miffed tone.
“Are you guys having fun?” a voice cut in.
I turned to see Mom and Dad standing there. Sebastian looked a little annoyed that they’d interrupted our exchange.
“Yes, I ate funnel cakes and chocolate ice cream!” Lilly piped up. She was winding down, so she’d probably need a nap soon.
My father’s face brightened up. Mom wore her usual sour expression, and her getup didn’t fit in with our little excursion. She looked like she was going out for a cocktail party, not a fair. So typical of her.
“That’s great, sweetheart. Would you like to come with me and your grandmother for a walk? We can even have some cotton candy if you like,” Dad asked. My mother’s face twisted at being called grandmother.
“Yeaaah!” she replied.
“Are you sure? She is a little tried,” I asked, looking at Sebastian. He didn’t seem to mind, but I wasn’t sure about leaving my daughter with my mother.
“Oh yes. I want to spend some time with my granddaughter,” my father said, touching my arm. Sebastian must have spoken to him if they were here and that must have cost him a lot. He hated my parents and since I told him about Nicolas, he could barely tolerate my mother’s presence.
The good thing was that Dad was here, and he’d be with Lilly for the most part, while my mother lagged behind, huffing and puffing in her precious high heels.
