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Chapter 16
(Damon)
I stood outside Eva’s dorm for several minutes, hoping that she would change her mind and come back out. What had she meant by “I wouldn’t be good for her”? I wish I knew more about her. She obviously had walls up that were going to take some time to tear down. I pulled my hat out of my pocket and once again pulled it down low over my eyes, hustling away so that Shelton could pull up the car. I was lost in thought while we drove back to the penthouse, thinking of Eva and how I could have more time with her.
My teammates had wanted to go out after practice but I had declined. I felt forlorn. Eva had given me a taste, and the taste was quickly growing into an obsession. I stood outside on my balcony later that night, drinking my favorite scotch. It burned as it went down my throat. I thought about what she had said, about how she didn’t think she was good enough for me. I knew she wouldn’t think that after she got to know me. Unwelcome thoughts of another time, and another girl, floated across my memory. I hadn’t thought about Camilla in ages. The guilt was always there though, laying just below the surface, rising up at inopportune times to waylay my thoughts. What I had done, what I continued to do, could never be atoned. I lived my life running from my memories, doing everything I could to forget, gorging myself in an excess of sex, alcohol, and every other manner of sin to get through it.
Wanting to shake off my dark thoughts, and get away from the temptation of the liquor in my hand and in the next room always held, I decided that I needed to stretch my wings. Making the decision, I set my drink down on the ledge, and took off my shirt. Stepping up on the balcony I sprang out into the night, my sprawling wings outstretched. It felt freeing to fly.
One of the few things I had to complain about was the need to hide my true nature. The night was the only time I could truly be myself. I wonder what Eva would think of this me if she knew. I had never even thought for a moment about telling a woman what I really was, they were all too temporary for that. But I could already tell Eva was unlike anyone else I had encountered. The energy that I felt pass between us when we had touched, my dreams, and that golden glow…she was different as well. She hopefully wouldn’t be frightened when I got up the nerve to tell her. And if I was being honest with myself, the scariest part of me for Eva wouldn’t be my wings, it would be my heart.
I found myself flying to campus. If any humans saw me I would just look like a shadow in this form so I wasn’t worried about anyone seeing me. Eva’s room was on the first floor of the dorm, so I hovered outside of it, hoping she would make an appearance. Her room was dark however and after a moment I knew she had most likely gone to sleep. Soaring away I resolved that I would win her over, no matter what I had to do.
