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"You're not wrong," June breathed. She swayed in Colin's arms. It was almost like she could hear music - wait. She could. Bluegrass music floated out of one of the rooms.
"A window must be open," Colin said absentmindedly. His arms pulled tight, then he clutched June's hand, spun her from him. "Dance with me, June." Their bodies moved together, apart, together, touching and dancing past each other. June remembered the basic steps from gym class, but neither she nor Colin could be considered a dancer, so they bumped into each other more than once.
Something magical was happening between the two of them. June couldn't deny it anymore. That whisper that had been poking around in the back of her mind for the past 72 hours had grown to a shout.
Colin continued to guide June throughout a few more songs, the faint smell of campfire in the night air, until June stopped him with a hand on his chest and asked, “Could we go home now?” How easy it was for June to refer to Colin’s tiny cabin as “home” when she had only spent two nights there, how much she could see herself fitting into the cracks that were open in his life. Colin kissed her on the forehead and mumbled something about “finally” and guided June through another clearing back onto the path that led to his cabin.
"Come to bed, June," Colin said, moving Muir off his shoes by the door. She nodded, not able to say a word, not able to break the silence between them. They trod softly into the bedroom and, still without talking, Colin lifted the shirt from June's torso, snapped her bra clasp. She did the same to his shirt, then they simultaneously removed their jeans, their underwear. Colin took June's hand again, flipped the covers up, and got under them, pulling June onto his chest.
“Are you tired?” he asked quietly, his voice gravely with a smokiness June hadn’t heard before. More of her body woke up as the sound reverberated through her, settled deep between her legs. She felt her nipples harden, knowing that her pulse had kicked up by a degree of ten.
“Not at all," she admitted and burrowed her face into the crook of his neck. She felt his arms tighten around her body and the small puff of heat behind her ear as he breathed out.
“Good,” he grunted. His hands roved up to burrow into her hair, gently massaging her scalp, his calluses catching small wisps of hair. She let out an embarrassing groan into his shoulder and felt a quick chuckle from Colin. She twisted her body, getting tangled in the sheets, and laid belly-down on him, her back arching at an uncomfortable angle. June wiggled down to get more comfortable, which placed her mouth at Colin’s collarbone, her toes hanging off the edge of the bed. She didn’t mind. Feeling that new, tell-tale smile spread across her lips, she pressed her mouth to the slice of skin just above his collarbone, then opened her mouth slightly to nip her teeth at the thin skin there.
Colin rolled over so they were facing each other, both on their sides, noses almost touching. June’s hands were curled up in front of her chest and Colin reached out to grasp her hands with his own.
“June, I -” he squeezed her hands. Colin sighed and closed his eyes, leaving that sentence unfinished. “I wish you didn’t have to leave tomorrow.”
Me too, she thought. “I have to go home,” is what she said.
“But you don’t even like it there.”
“I like parts of it. I love Kevin. I like my mattress. I like seeing the foothills in the morning.” June knew she was grasping at straws with her list. A mattress? A mattress that was cold and lonely and didn’t have this man as a part of it.
“You could come back,” Colin said softly. “On weekends. Or whenever you want. I like having you here. You fit here.”
There was a flash of images in her head. Waking up each morning to Muir curled on her feet. Coffee from a Moka pot each morning with Colin in the tiny kitchen. Campfires and beers and more late night talks. Watching Colin adopt 400 kids each week of the summer and make them laugh.
Colin.
Colin.
Colin.
“There’s an opening at camp,” Colin continued. “You could apply and get it immediately. You could direct our retreat programs. You could live here. With me.”
June was speechless.
She wanted to say yes, to throw caution to the wind and jump in with both feet. But the last three years had made her gun shy and hesitant.
“Colin, I can’t.” She felt his body deflate next to her. “I’m trying to figure my shit out. This week was supposed to help me clear my head, but it’s only made me more confused.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re here and I’m not. You’re set in your career and I’m floundering. This place is yours and I don't know mine.” June felt her eyes sting, blinking back the tears that were gathering at the edges. “I know this feels good, but the real world is knocking and I have to go back and figure it out.”
Colin let out a slow sigh, then pulled June close to him, maneuvering his face close to hers. She could hear each breath he took, felt the warm air touch her cheek, then her temple, as he moved his lips close to her ear. “I’m falling in love with you,” he whispered.
I think I’m already in love with you, she thought. “Colin, it’s been four days,” is what she said.
“So?”
“So, it’s been four days.”
“I took this job after one day.”
“I’m not like that,” June sighed and rolled over. “I plan things. I spent years putting together this career and I can’t just throw it away in a second.”
