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SIX
Well, this is awkward as ass.
Eden shifted in her seat for the umpteenth time, holding her coffee cup in both hands like a talisman. Chandler had walked in looking just as gorgeous as he had the week before, and damn if her unwanted attraction toward him hadn’t kicked in full-force despite her wishes.
She didn’t want to want him. Not like that. She had bigger things to deal with. Mainly, figuring out a way to get him to help her that didn’t involve him watching over her like a hawk twenty-four seven.
He stood in line now, getting his drink, frequently glancing over at her as if he was afraid she’d disappear or something. She watched him from beneath her lashes, sipping her hazelnut latte every once in a while so it wouldn’t seem like she was checking him out, though she totally was. She always did whenever she saw him, starting when she was about thirteen.
Seventeen-year-old Chandler Ruthven had been gorgeous, sure, but he looked even better now. He still had a lean, athletic build, but there was a strength there now that hadn’t been there when they were kids. A toughness. Not bravado, but a quiet tenacity, like once he started something, he wouldn’t quit until he saw it through. Good. She’d need his strength and resolve on her side if she was going to remember all the stuff she had to remember before the trial.
If he agrees to help me.
Rising anxiety made her clench her cup tighter. God, this was exactly why she hated depending on other people for things. The uncertainty. She honestly hadn’t felt this stressed since the time her ex had left her in a parking lot in California and forgotten about her. Eden sighed and shook her head, staring down into her coffee. She didn’t like to think about Trent often. He was part of her past, and if Eden had a motto for her life, it would be Don’t Look Back. Or maybe Just Do it (Yourself). Anyway, Trent wasn’t a bad guy, not really. But he was completely unfit to be an actual grown-up.
He’d been great at high school—popular, good-looking, athletic, charming. He’d never been an especially strong student, but he’d done well enough to get by, thanks in no small part to a smile people found it hard to say no to. He had a cousin who worked in tech in California and who had promised to hook him up with a job after graduation. He had asked her to come with him, and it had all sounded so exciting and liberating. After eighteen years of being the eternal baby of the family—fussed over and smothered and treated like she was incapable—the idea of marrying Trent and going away with him, starting over fresh in a place where she could stand on her own two feet without answering to anyone, had been too good to resist. They got married right after graduating and had moved across the country within a month. It didn’t take long for things to go downhill.
The tech job, of course, had been bullshit. No one wanted to hire a couple of kids just out of high school with no college degrees and no on-the-job experience. They had to scramble to find something just to make ends meet. For a year, they made do, working fast-food places and picking up temporary work where they could. Got a basic apartment in a sketchy neighborhood they could mostly afford. It wasn’t really much of a life, but things would get better. Or so she’d thought.
Ever the optimist, Eden had been determined to make it work. They just needed a leg up. So, she’d started going out to job interviews. One day, she’d had a sweet one lined up for a receptionist job at a fancy plastic surgery clinic. Entry level, no experience necessary, but benefits after ninety days, and the pay was better than minimum wage. It sounded perfect. Only problem was, Trent was also supposedly going out to job hunt that day too. He’d dropped her off at the clinic and said he’d be back in two hours to pick her up.
She waited for him almost seven hours, but he never showed. Eden finally managed to find enough bus fare in her purse to get home. When she arrived, Trent was there, watching TV and drinking beer. He’d looked up at her in total surprise, as if he’d forgotten she lived there. Before she could open her mouth to ask him where the hell he’d been, he started telling her about how his job interview had fallen through, so he’d gone to the racetrack instead. He actually seemed to expect her to be pleased,since he’d won some money for a change.
It was the beginning of the end for her. Within six months, she’d filed for divorce and moved back home to Virginia. There was a dog grooming salon in Richmond that provided on-the-job training. It was a pain-in-the-neck commute from Charlottesville, where she was staying with her parents to save on expenses, but it was worth it to gain the skill and experience to eventually open her own salon.
Funny how she’d thought marrying and moving to California would be her chance to finally become independent. It wasn’t until she left him that she’d finally been able to map out a life she was happy with. But if nothing else, her failure of a marriage had taught her an important lesson: never again to let herself become reliant on another person.
“Hey,” Chandler said, sliding into the booth across from her, his smile a bit hesitant. “Didn’t expect to hear from you again.”
Eden looked away. She knew it wasn’t fair to take it out on Chandler, but she couldn’t help resenting the choice she had to make, especially after all those Trent memories resurfaced. Chandler wasn’t anything like her ex. Trent wouldn’t have lasted five minutes as a SEAL. But memories of Trent always reminded her that she should handle things herself rather than counting on anyone else. She shrugged and fiddled with her watch, her pulse thudding in her ears. “Didn’t expect to call you.”
“But you did,” Chandler said, removing the lid from his cup and stirring the whipped cream into his coffee. She raised a brow. She hadn’t thought a big, tough guy like him would drink something frou-frou with sprinkles. Guess she was wrong. About a lot of things. He must’ve caught her staring because he chuckled. “I know. These things are horrible for you. Nothing but empty calories, but I can’t resist the caramel crunch topping, so…” He set the used stirrer aside and took a sip, licking his upper lip afterward and giving her all sorts of inappropriate thoughts about swirling her tongue over his… Whoa! She put the brakes on.
Her cheeks heated as she cast around for something to say.
“What can I help you with?” he asked.
His question brought her back to earth, and she wished she could just get up and walk away, tell him her call had been a mistake, that she didn’t need any help. But unfortunately, that wasn’t true. After her deposition, it had become clear she needed to remember everything about the murder and fast. Otherwise, the guy who’d done it could walk away free. So, she swallowed her pride past the lump in her throat and blurted it out. “I need you to help me remember the murder I witnessed.”
Chandler just blinked at her a second, his face blank. “Uh, well, I’m not really sure what I could do. I don’t know anything about amnesia.”
“You and my brother both know all the details of the case,” she went on. “And there’s a chance that going back to some of the places where things happened might help jar my memory. Maybe we can go over the case and investigate things, too. Learn more about this guy I’m trying to put away. Surely something will kick-start my memories if we really go digging.”
He sat back, shaking his head. “I get what you’re saying, but I’m not sure I’m the right one to help. My field is security. That’s what Adam asked me to help you with, so if I came on board with you, that’s what I’d handle.”
“I don’t need a bodyguard.” Eden gave him a flat, no-nonsense stare. It always worked with her more difficult canine clients, getting them to behave. Hopefully, it would work here too. Hopefully, he wouldn’t see behind the bravado to the fear and uncertainty she felt inside.
“You don’t need to do the police’s job for them either.”
She couldn’t help flinching a little at that.
“Look, Eden,” he said, after an aggrieved sigh. “I’m sure having huge holes in your memory is frustrating. And frightening. But it doesn’t mean you can go off and investigate a murder on your own. Let the police do their job. If you started digging into things, you might even hinder their investigation.”
“I’m not going to interfere with the case,” she said, forcing her voice to stay calm even though she was raging inside. “I just need to remember what happened. So I can testify. And if I have to go step by step over what happened, then I will. If this guy doesn’t go to prison for killing the cashier, it’s going to be my fault. I couldn’t live with that happening.”
“Stop thinking like that.” He sat forward again, taking a deep breath and lowering his tone. “Stressing yourself out won’t improve the situation. Neither will putting yourself in danger by trying to hunt down leads. Don’t forget, your car accident might not have been an accident at all. If someone already wants you out of the picture, you need to lie low for a while. Running around, going to all these places involved in the case is the opposite of playing it safe. No.” He frowned down at the tabletop, jaw set. “I won’t help you do that.”
Shit. This was not going the way she wanted at all. They sat there for a few tense seconds while Eden tried to reform a different plan, one he might agree to. He’d said he’d act as bodyguard, so maybe she could use that to her advantage. Eden met his gaze across the table. “If you’re so concerned about my safety, you can protect me as my bodyguard while I investigate on my own. If you’re going to be hanging around all the time, following me everywhere, then you can make yourself useful when I need help. You know you’re not going to be able to talk me out of investigating. But if you’re with me, you can make sure I stay as safe as possible.”
