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I stared at Quinton sitting across from me looking calm, peaceful even.
Case in point, I thought.
"This is you," Quinton said seriously. "Or, the you that you've recently become."
I frowned at him, not understanding his meaning. I didn't see myself in that card at all. It actually seemed a card better suited for himself than for me.
"You don't believe me?" he asked incredulously. "This isallyou. You might not be physically strong, I'll admit to that, but you have an inner strength and a resilience that humbles me. It takes courage to have gone through the things you have and still allow yourself to not be beaten down by life and to remain hopeful. You're compassionate and kind, which is another thing that always surprises me about you. This card isallabout the person you are becoming and I think it says good things about where you're headed as a person."
I swallowed thickly, no longer looking at the cards between us, my focus entirely on the man sitting on the floor across from me.
From the moment he'd laid eyes on me in a dream, he'd been all about me and I'd become the center of his entire universe.
"I don't think you see me the right way," I whispered hoarsely, emotion clogging my throat.
He smiled sadly at me. "It's you who can't see straight. Not where you're concerned."
"Whatever you say, Quinton," I replied in a sarcastic voice. I was almost more uncomfortable having this conversation with him than I had been when we were talking about sex.
He chuckled quietly. "You can never just take a compliment." The thin, white scars covering his finger glinted in the candlelight as he tapped it against the last card. He smirked at me. "And this one?"
I looked down at the last card and gasped.
"Oh, no, no, no," I whispered in horror. "We're all gonna die. Seriously, Quinton, I don't want to do this anymore."
I knew my fear was entirely irrational, but I couldn't seem to make it stop as I stared down at the Death card.
The Death card had a skeleton wearing black armor while riding a white horse. He's carrying a black flag in his hands. A flag that has a flower on it, a rose. The horse and rider are standing over a dead body on the ground while a man, woman, and child stand in front of it.
The picture on the card is fucking terrifying.
"Breathe, baby," Quinton urged in a warm voice. "You're freaking out about nothing and you need to calm down. It's not actually a bad card and I know you know that because you're smart and you wouldn't have skipped this card in your studies."
My breath evened out as I let his words sink in. He was, of course, right. It's just that word Death is so incredibly final that it was a shock to see.
"Nobody's going to die," I breathed out. "You're right and I'm being irrational. Everything I read about it said it was the death of something, not someone specifically, and the beginning of something."
"That's right, baby," he murmured in approval. "It symbolizes the ending of a phase in your life that's no longer any good for you, and the beginning of something new. Change is coming and it's going to be a good one for you. I'm really digging this card because any change that's good for you is good for the rest of us. Please stop freaking out."
I wasn't freaking out anymore. I was just second-guessing how much I had wanted this in the first place and wishing I could give it back, return it like a bad Christmas present. From now on I really wanted to be on the other side of things, because I didn't think I wanted to know what my future held anymore. Change was on the horizon but I still had no idea what it was.
"Are you tired?" he asked me, changing the subject abruptly.
"Nooooo," I whined. "I could maybe sleep again in like forty-five years." My body felt like it had been asleep for forever.
He laughed at me before climbing to his feet.
"We'll leave your cards in here for now," he told me as he bent over at the waist and blew out each candle.
I stacked the cards in a neat pile as he went around the circle, blowing out the candles. I stood up with the cards clutched in my hand, pressed against my chest. For someone who claimed they didn't want anymore gifts from him, I sure wasn't ready to let the beautiful cards go.
He smiled at me knowingly.
"Come on, baby. Let's go on downstairs. I'm still hungry and could go for something hot to eat this time. Those sandwiches didn't cut it for me."
I placed the neat stack of cards down on his upside down milk crate. It didn't feel right to take them from his room just yet. Maybe it was because I knew I'd have a reason to come back to his bedroom if I left them in here.
He took my hand and pulled me into the hall.
