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"To convince them that we mistakenly thought that we were in love."
"But we’re not in love," she points out.
"Precisely." I nod. "Which is why, when we decide to get the marriage annulled, no one will raise an eyebrow. In fact, given that, by then, we'd have proven to be incompatible, and it will be all too believable that," I peer into her face, "our marriage was a complete mistake."
"And what’s the benefit of that?"
"They won’t bother me about getting married to anyone else for a long time after that."
She purses her lips. "Somehow, I can’t see you being bothered by anyone about being married."
"Have you met my nonna?" I tilt my head. "She’s been planning our weddings from the moment each of us were born. And now that Michael's married, and with Xander’s passing…" I firm my lips.
"You were saying?" she prompts.
"Nothing." I straighten my spine. "Fake marriage. You and me. That’s all you need to know."
"Hmm…" She takes in my features. "What’s in it for me?"
I glare at her. "Really?" I snap. "You dare ask me that?"
She pales but doesn’t glance away. "Yes," she says in a firm voice, "I need to know what’s in it for me."
I take a step toward her and she leans back, only there’s nowhere for her to go so she presses back and into the counter. I close the distance between us, plant my hands on the counter, and cage her in.
"You were saying?"
"I was asking a question, actually." She tips up her chin. "What’s in it for me, Christian?"
I peer into her features, and her pupils dilate. Her brown eyes lighten until they seem almost golden in this light. I lean in closer until my breath raises the hair on her forehead. I run my finger down the side of her cheek, and she shivers.
"Don’t," she murmurs, "don’t try to distract me."
"Oh, so I do distract you?"
"Don’t change the topic."
I step back, and the breath rushes out of her.
"Your life, Aurora. You get a new lease on life."
"So," she furrows her forehead, "if I pretend to be your wife for thirty days, I’ll be free to leave and live as I want?"
I nod slowly. "If you fulfill all of the conditions, and provided you put up enough of a performance that my nonna and brothers are convinced of the veracity of our relationship."
She bites down on her lower lip, and hell, if my gaze isn’t drawn to her glistening flesh. Why the hell does this woman affect me so? She’s only a convenience, after all. Someone to use and discard. So I can go back to the life I prefer to lead. To be surrounded by enough pussy so I can forget I lost my twin brother. The other half of my soul. The one who’s been with me since before we were born.
Xander and I were so different, yet so alike. He was the artist, and I’m the numbers guy. It’s why steering the finances of theCosa Nostrafell to me. If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s getting the numbers to speak to me. Numbers don’t lie. They can’t hide. They can’t hurt you like our father did.
After Michael left to study in the States, my father had turned his anger on us. Luca, our second oldest brother, had gotten the brunt of it. Massimo, our middle brother, had already grown big and tall enough that our father didn’t dare hurt him. But Xander and me? We were still small and young enough that he knew he could hurt us without fear of retaliation.
Perhaps it's because I was older by a few minutes that I felt responsible for both of us. I had tried to protect Xander from being physically beaten up by our father, and I mostly succeeded. I still have the scars to show for it too… I saved him then, but when he was killed by the car bomb that our father had meant for Michael's wife Karma, I wasn’t able to go to his rescue. The bomb was faulty, but a piece of metal had embedded in his chest and killed him immediately. Karma had been in the car, and she managed to escape, but she was pregnant and had lost her child. We’ve all suffered.
But losing Xander... It’s a trauma that haunts me, that sticks to me, that accompanies me day and night, like a shadow which refuses to peel away from me. I’ll never be the same again, never be able to see myself in the mirror without seeing my twin brother. Never be able to experience life without thinking that he’ll never be able to see, smell, and taste life. It should have been me who died in that incident, not him.
Me who was buried under the earth, not him.
I don’t deserve any happiness, not when Xander won’t get to experience it.
