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“I don’t think so, unless you count my hands. They hurt like hell, what were you doing?”
“As soon as you saw the portal, you tried to go for it. Just that quick look was all it took, and you were desperate to get to it. For some reason, I couldn’t pull you away. Physically, I mean. It was like you were caught in a gravitational pull or something.” He frowned as he lifted my hands to look at them closely. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you, but you wouldn’t come back.”
“I couldn’t. I don’t know what happened, either. One second I was telling myself I would take a quick look, and the next… I would have killed everyone I’ve ever met just to get through that doorway.”
“Now you understand.”
I did. The indescribable need to get to the other side of that door would haunt me for the rest of my life.
“How about you? You didn’t have the urge to cross the portal?”
“I kept my eyes shut, which seemed to do the trick. I still felt the pull to cross it, but it wasn’t irresistible.”
“Well, at least now we know it’s a visual thing. So maybe coming back blindfolded—”
“Coming back? Coming back? You can’t seriously be considering returning.”
I honestly couldn’t answer him. No, going back there was not a good idea. And yet, I felt the need to return already. It wasn’t nearly as overpowering as it had been before, but it was in the back of my mind, a steady drumbeat that would grow incessantly louder until I acquiesced to its demand.
“We should go. Whatever is beyond there is still calling to me. I think the longer I stay here, the worse it will become, and I’ll need to go back again.”
Remy didn’t hesitate. He grabbed me by the elbow—which my poor hands appreciated—and began to guide me toward the entrance to the cave. When we reached the mouth, we were both hunched so we could avoid scraping our heads on the roof of the entry.
I had expected it to still be dark when we walked out, so stepping into a ray of sunshine confused me.
“How long were we in there?”
“At least overnight, and from the position of the sun, it looks like it might be late afternoon.”
Oh my gods, we had been gone that long? Darrio was going to freak out if he hadn’t already. He must have come back to my room expecting to find me there asleep, only for me to have disappeared.
“We have to get back.”
“Of course.” He made a move to pick me up again, but I warded him off.
“I’ll walk.”
“But you don’t have any shoes.”
“I know, but I’ll be fine. It’s a long walk back, and I wouldn’t feel comfortable having you carry me that distance. Besides, after the shitty night I had, my feet getting a little scraped up sounds like a literal walk in the park.” Despite my bravado, some small piece of me wanted to jump into his arms and let him whisk me away.
Away from the cave.
Away from the portal.
Away from Divinity altogether.
Instead, I pulled on my big-girl panties—metaphorically speaking, since I was still commando—and we started the long trek back to campus.
