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Chapter Twenty-Four
My head.
It felt like someone had run a steamroller over it and my mouth was drier than the Sahara Desert.
There was a reason I didn’t ever drink this much. As well as being a lightweight, I couldn’t handle the hangover afterwards.
Back in the day, I used to be sensible and guzzle a load of water before I went to sleep and then I’d be okay-ish in the morning. But I’d been in no fit state to do that last night, so I’d have to suffer the consequences.
Still, it could have been worse. If Roxy and Geli hadn’t spotted me, I could be sleeping half-naked outside my room door right now. Or be recovering from the embarrassment of going to reception with just a serviette covering my boobs. In the grand scheme of things, I was lucky.
There was a knock at the door. Must be Bella. I think I remember her saying she’d call for me to go for breakfast together. Might be better for her to head down alone, as I needed to at least wash my face first, express some milk because my boobs were feeling full and, seeing as I still only had my knickers on, get dressed.
I reached for my dressing gown, wrapped it tightly around me, then opened the door.
‘Surprise!’ said Roxy and Bella.
‘What the…?’ They barged through the door, whipped off their dressing gowns and stood next to each other with their hands on their hips, wearing just their underwear. ‘What are you doing here and why are you both standing there in your undies?’
‘Well!’ Roxy folded her arms. ‘I really didn’t like the way you were talking about your body earlier. Seems like working in beauty PR has given you some sort of warped perception of whatrealwomen look like. So we thought you needed a little reminder…’
‘Definitely,’ said Bella. ‘I was surprised when Roxy told me what happened. I thought because you work behind the scenes and you know all about the airbrushing that goes on, you’d be the last person to buy into that nonsense.’
‘Of course I know it’s all fake. It’s just…’ I plonked myself down on the bed. ‘I always thought that I could be some sort of super mum who’d be able to get back into shape. Not straight away, of course, and I didn’t think I’d be able to lookexactlyhow I did before I was pregnant, but I thought I’d at least be makingsomeprogress. I don’t get it. I’ve been exercising every day, trying to control my portion sizes and cut back on sweet treats—well, not this weekend obviously—but the weight just isn’t shifting. And I own a bloody beauty PR agency which gives me access to all the best lotions and potions, so I’ve been slathering on oils and creams religiously since I was pregnant to avoid getting stretch marks and I’mstillcovered in them.’
‘But that’s normal! And you’re still gorgeous,’ said Bella. ‘Look at us. We’ve both got stretch marks either from losing weight or having a baby. And name me one woman you know who doesn’t have cellulite.’
‘Or flabby bits!’ said Roxy, wobbling her thighs. ‘But do our bodies look horrible to you?’
‘No, of course not!’ I scoffed.
‘Well, then! And yours doesn’t either.’
‘Look, I know I shouldn’t feel like I have to look perfect and I know I’m supposed to believe in the wholeI’m beautiful no matter whatmantra, but in reality it’s hard. My body has completely changed, and the truth is, I don’t like it.’
‘Take off your dressing gown,’ snapped Roxy.
‘No!’
‘Why?’
‘Because I don’t want to!’
‘Bella, please help me. This robe is coming off!’
‘Roxy!’ I said as they came closer. ‘You can’t…’
‘Soph, we’re not here to force you or make you feel uncomfortable.’ Bella touched my shoulder gently. ‘We just want to help you. For you to see what we see. Do you think you could take it off?Please?’
I saw the fire in Roxy’s eyes. She wasn’t going to let up.
Oh, what the hell.
They’d seen me naked before, so at least once they saw how different I looked now, they’d understand and get off my back.
‘Okay…’ I peeled it off cautiously and winced as it dropped to the floor.
‘There you go!’ said Bella. ‘I think you lookamazing!’
