AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Chapter Seven
Ipicked up a pen and notepad then opened up a fresh page. Just as I’d made my MAP (Make Albert Proud) plan two years ago, when I’d vowed to end my last relationship, work less and live more, it was time to set some more goals to make my new life in Italy a success.
I believed that if there was something you weren’t happy about, it was important to do something to change it, and in my experience, making a list was always the best way to sort things out. Once I’d written everything down, my mind would be clearer. I’d have a road map of what I had to achieve, and like I had before, if I tackled each task, I could get my life back under control again.
I didn’t have time to think of a name for it. Even though Leo was exhausted from all the drama this morning, his schedule was out of sync, so it was difficult to predict how long he’d be asleep. And I’d already procrastinated for too long. I had to do this now before I found another excuse not to.
Right. First and foremost:
1) Learn Italian
Priority number one. My Italian language skills were abysmal. How was it that I had managed to get a first-class degree in French and yet was doing so badly with Italian? It was pathetic. I’d fully intended to take lessons in London before I came here so I’d be well prepared, but with the business, getting ready for the birth and one thing and another, I hadn’t had time. But there could be no more excuses. I needed to apply myself more. Study harder. Just like I did at uni.
I’d start by researching that Italian teacher Lorenzo had mentioned and find out when her earliest available lesson was. There was no reason I couldn’t learn another language. This was not beyond my capabilities. I just needed to structure my days better and pull my bloody finger out.
Next up…this one was definitely needed:
2) Make Some New Friends
I’d always felt isolated here, but this morning really brought home how much. Without Lorenzo, I had no one. I needed to get new friends. It would be nice to have someone else to talk to so my life didn’t solely revolve around my boyfriend, baby and work. Although I still messaged and spoke to Bella and Roxy, it wasn’t the same. They were hundreds of miles away and we were all busy. I missed them so much. Especially our monthly Food, Therapy and Alcohol catch-ups (or FTA sessions as Roxy, Queen of the Acronyms, preferred to call them), but I couldn’t spend time pining and feeling lonely. This was the life I’d chosen, so I had to make it work.
I knew it would be tricky because most people I’d seen seemed to be pensioners, but there must be other mums here? Or some sort of organised mother and baby group? Maybe that was a bit of a stretch as it was such a small town, but I had to at least look into it.
The whole language barrier thing was another issue, but maybe we could do a little exchange: I help them learn English and they help me with my Italian? It was worth a shot…
3) Be More Independent
Sometimes living here felt like being a kid again. I couldn’t do anything without asking for someone else’s help. I couldn’t go to the supermarket by myself or explain basic things to a doctor. For someone who had been used to being independent for so long, it was hard to depend on other people to help me do the things I’d been doing for decades on my own in London.
I didn’t want to keep having to ask Lorenzo or have to rely on Marta. I needed to be stronger.
4) Sort Out My Sex Life
Here we go again… I was only a few weeks away from reaching thesix months without sexstatus—in other words, becoming a Middle-Aged Virgin.
When Lorenzo and I had finally got together, I’d thought my sexless days were over.Pff.
On the one hand, I knew I’d just birthed a small human, which was no small feat, but surely I should be back in the game by now. I needed to figure out a way to revive my sexual mojo and, in the meantime, make more of an effort to keep Lorenzo satisfied in the bedroom. Not because he expected me to. He didn’t. Thankfully, he wasn’t someone who saw sex as a duty that a womanowedto her man. I wanted to do it because I loved him and I also remembered how frustrating it felt to have a partner who didn’t want to be intimate. And whilst Lorenzo had been patient so far, even the kindest, most reasonable guy would have his limits. He couldn’t wait forever.
If I wasn’t ready for full-blown nookie, maybe I could try and start with something easier. A hand job or a BJ? Can’t say the prospect of exercising my right hand or giving my mouth a workout was remotely appealing, as like the names suggested, it did sound like anotherjobto add to my massive to-do list and I could use those five minutes to sleep, but I was going totryand give it a go. Lorenzo was more than worth it. There must be books or articles on getting it on again after having kids. I couldn’t be the only woman in the world who had experienced a post-partum sexual slump.
5) Get Back Into Shape
If I was going to be swinging from the chandeliers (not that we had any, but you catch my drift), then I needed to get my body back into shape. I’d been doing online classes and going for walks every day, but the weight just wasn’t shifting. I couldn’t let myself go. Not just because it was affecting my confidence, but also because I needed to be healthy for Leo, so that when he was older, I’d be able to run around with him in the garden without doubling-over and panting like a hippo attempting a 100-metre sprint. Loads of mums got back into shape after having a baby, so I should too.
And as well as upping the ante on the exercise front, I needed to be more disciplined with food. Just because Lorenzo baked multiple times a week and was always feeding me delicious pasta, it didn’t mean I had to shovel it down in such large quantities. It was ridiculous. Especially the sponge addiction. One minute there was a large slab of my favourite crushed Florentine orange cake in front of me and the next, I’d glance down and wonder where it had all gone.In my gut, that’s where. I know his cakes were always so tasty, but I had to learn to resist having that second, third and usually fourth slice. As the saying goes,a moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips. Or in my case, hips, thighs, stomach, arse…
Yep. I definitely needed to get my fitness and healthy eating regime in check, lose these extra pounds and get my body back under control.
6) Have a Good Relationship with Lorenzo’s Mum
Oh boy.I already knew thatthiswas going to be painful. I was trying. I really was. At times I felt like I was sucking up to Marta so much that my head was going to disappear up her butt (now,that’sa horrible thought). But although it grated on me, it had to be done, right? If she was anyone else, I wouldn’t even give her the time of day, but Marta was Lorenzo’s belovedmammaand it would make him happy, so I needed to try harder and find a way for her to like me and for us to get along.
Ugh.
Can you believe she didn’t even phone me back after seeing my missed call when Leo was sick? Lorenzo said she’d thought I’d phoned her by mistake, so she didn’t see the point. But that’sexactlywhy she should have known it was an emergency. She should have realised that I’d only ever put myself through the pain of dialling her number if I was desperate.
I knew she thought I was a rubbish mum and girlfriend because my cooking and domestic skills weren’t as world-class as hers. And on the home front, she was right. I was no Martha Stewart or Mrs Hinch, but I’d show her that I could do better. Iwouldbe a great mum and girlfriend.
