Page 100 of When the Ice Melts


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Shame inflated her soul, hot and brassy. She hung her head, unwilling for Darius to see her in this kind of costume, in so much makeup. The man who once accused her of being fake must surely believe it now, seeing her like this. Self-consciously she tugged on the hem of her miniskirt, trying unsuccessfully to lengthen it.

“Thank you for—for being here.” The words sounded weak, inadequate. There were so many questions she couldn’t ask. One she dared. “How—are you here?”

Darius quirked his mouth to the side. “I had a—a tip you were here. I caught a flight from Vancouver. Got in about four hours ago and came straight here.”

That still didn’t make sense. “No, I mean—I guess I mean why are you here?”

Darius paused. Addisyn dared to look up for the first time. She saw emotion in his eyes.

He started to speak, stopped. Swallowed hard, started again. “Because you, Addisyn Miles, are not a fake.”

Heat raced in a flaming wave over her face. What did he mean?

“I—I don’t understand.” There was so much she didn’t understand.

Instead of answering, Darius just smiled. Without warning, he reached out and caught her hands in his. “First of all, I want to say I’m sorry.” His head hung slightly. “You came to see me at the center, and I was a complete jerk. It wasn’t until later that I realized I didn’t even let you tell me anything. I was so scared of being hurt that I had my mind all made up. I thought I understood everything.” His eyes were damp. “I should have never let Brian change my mind about who I knew you were.”

Tears filled Addisyn’s eyes. She would have given everything in her soul to be able to stand before him and tell him that Brian had lied, that she’d never been that girl or done those things. The weight of the past felt like an iron chain around her neck. “Darius, everything Brian told you is true.” Oh, she would give anything to make it not so. “I am a skater, and I did live with him. After I broke up with him, I came to Whistler to try to figure things out. Find answers.” She couldn’t meet his eyes. “I’ve ruined everything so badly.” Tears made dark drips on the velvet dress. “I’ve failed so many times in my life, and I wish I could undo it all.” She had to wait for a sob to jerk loose before she could continue. “I don’t even know who I am anymore.”

“Hmm.” There was no hint of anger or condemnation in Darius’s tone. “Lucky for you, I do.”

“You do—what?” She sniffled and dared to meet his gaze for the first time.

His eyes were like the ocean in summer—calm, gentle, and full of sunshine. “I do know who you are.” His tone was as soothing as the waves on the beach. “You are Addisyn Miles. You’re a beautiful figure skater who performs with her whole heart on the ice. You’re a courageous person who climbs mountains and chases dreams and pushes for answers. And best of all, you’re a survivor.” His thumbs gently rubbed the backs of her hands. “You’re a woman who’s gone forward when everyone told her she couldn’t. Sure, you’ve fallen some, but you’ve gotten up every single time. You’re a warrior, Addisyn.” Intensity rang clearly in his voice.

If only she were all of those things. Addisyn shook her head. “Darius, I’ve made so many mistakes.”

“I left out one part.” Darius leaned closer. “You’re a woman with a second chance.”

“How do you know?” This all sounded wonderful, but none of it made sense.

“Because I just got one.” A smile like she’d never seen on him before irradiated his face. “Addisyn, I’ve been trying to measure up. Trying to meet my own bar of perfection. I forgot about something.” He sighed. “God’s grace.”

God’s grace?“Darius, I’m so far away from God now.” She shook her head. “I can’t find my way back.”

“That’s the great thing about God. He comes to you.”

He comes to you.

The words comforted like a warm spring breeze. Addisyn felt her insides settling. “Like you did.”

Darius just shrugged. “When you love someone—” his eyes held hers—“you go to them.” His grip tightened on her hands. “I’ve been waiting in the back of the arena all morning to see you skate. It was amazing. But that wasn’t the most amazing thing I saw today.”

“What was that?” Her voice was almost a whisper.

The passion in Darius’s voice told her he meant every word. “I saw you stand within a stone’s throw of gold and give it all up. I saw you run off that ice because you were done with being fake. And then I followed you back here and saw you break chains that you’d willingly worn for years.” Addisyn didn’t even try to stop the tears as Darius continued. “I saw you make a big decision today—the decision to live in the light. God’s light. Now I just want you to believe it’s possible.” He smiled. “Don’t do what I did. Don’t try to be perfect. There’s a new beginning waiting for you. It’s a gift, so don’t try to repay it.” He leaned forward and briefly touched his forehead to hers. “Just accept it.”

Addisyn took a deep breath. Her soul felt strangely fragile. All the emotions of the past few days had wreaked havoc with her heart. Yet at the same time, the shadows were rising from her spirit and floating away on that fresh, sweet breeze of hope.

Darius was right. She still wasn’t sure about God—what He expected from her, what He wanted for her. But this she knew: the love He offered her was real, as real as if it were a tangible rope she could use to pull herself out of the pit she’d been trapped in for so long.

She was done with fake love—and not just the song. In fact, she was done with all things fake. She was ready to be Addisyn Miles—whoever God had meant for Addisyn Miles to be. It might take her a lifetime to figure that out, but finally, she was willing to try.

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