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“You didn’t know love or anything about men,” he said. “Ash is a bastard for fucking us both over.”
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were more upset that Ash hid our relationship from you than you are that he left me without a word.”
He shook his head. “I’m not in a mood to argue about this again.”
“You brought it up,” I said, watching him as he began to pace.
“It just fucking pisses me off. I should kick his ass.” He stopped and looked at me. “When I found out, I wanted to rip his head off, but I did as you asked. I’ve kept my mouth shut. What I wanted to do was beat the shit out of him and burn the club down.”
“Ben, you’re overreacting.” It broke my heart to see how Ben had changed over the last two years. It wasn’t just Ash’s betrayal. Or the drinking. His change from a fun, happy guy to this dark, pessimistic man started when my father’s health declined and he realized some of the bad business decisions he’d made. People would likely blame Ben for the company’s problems and probable demise, but the truth was, my father made deals that doomed the business. And Ben, working his ass off to fix it, lost himself.
“How should I react, Beth? My best friend fucked my little sister and knocked her up.”
“Leave Hannah out of this,” I warned him. I gave him a lot of leeway to complain about my relationship with Ash, but I wasn’t going to let him turn Hannah into something sordid.
“You know what’s the worst thing about all this?” he said, picking up his glass and downing his drink.
“What?”
“I almost feel bad for the guy. I want to knock his block off and ruin him, but I also want him to know he’s a father.”
I felt the ground shake underneath me because I couldn’t be sure he wouldn’t do just that. Whether because he felt Ash should know, out of retaliation, or in a drunken stupor, I lived in fear of Ben revealing my secret. I stood. “We agreed, Ben.”
“Fuck!” He threw his glass across the room, shattering it against the wall that held a picture of my father. “I should have never agreed to that. He’s a fucking asshole but he deserves to know he’s got a child.”
“If he finds out, he’s in our lives forever. Is that what you want?”
Ben picked up the contract. I’d gone to dinner with Ash to get it signed and ended up having sex with him for that. “You’re not doing a very good job of staying away from him. Maybe having him out of your life isn’t what you want.”
“I had to see him to finish the deal, Ben. That’s it.” I hated lying to him, but he was clearly in no place to hear the truth. “The deal is done. I’m packing up the townhouse and it’s for sale. The offer still stands. You get your drinking under control; you can come with Hannah and me.”
“So that’s it? You’re ready to let the business die and go bankrupt.”
I felt my anger dissipate, replaced by sadness. “We don’t have much of a choice, Ben.” I walked over to him. It felt like it was me and him against the world sometimes. “This isn’t of our making and even if it was, we need to be smart. We have our own lives to live. You, in particular, have given too much to save something dad ruined. It’s time to let that go. Take care of yourself. Get well. Find your passion.”
He looked down on me, his eyes still glassy and yet hard. “I’m not selfish like you.”
I recoiled, hating that he’d become so mean. “I’m not the one spending what little money we have on Glenfiddich and wasting his life in a drunken haze.”
He snarled at me. “I’m trying to save our family legacy.”
“You might have better luck if you did it sober.” I took a breath, not wanting to get into an all-out fight with my brother. “I get that you took over a very difficult situation and that you’re working hard to fix a sinking ship. But don’t underestimate what I’ve done. I’ve taken care of everything else, Ben because you’re too drunk to. The house, grocery shopping, bills, the staff we had to let go, mom, Ash… And I’ve been okay with that because I know trying to save the company is a big task. But if you don’t make things any easier by drinking and whining.”
“You’re so miserable, why don’t you just go to Ash. I’m sure he’d be happy to give you back the lifestyle you’re so used to. All you’d have to do is spread your legs.”
I wasn’t a violent woman, but there was no stopping the slap that I delivered to Ben’s cheek. His eyes widened as did mine. What had happened to us?
