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“Aaron still lives around here. Everyone knows him, including my sons.”
“What did you do?”
“Well, being the asshole that I was, a few days later, when her Aaron dropped her like a sack of potatoes and she cried her eyes out, I told her that I loved her and that I would be there for her and the kids and she told me to leave. She told me that I did it to her and that her sons were all she had left in the world to love.”
He lowered his head, and she heard his shaky breaths.
“You need to tell your sons. You need to explain this to them,” Ava whispered as she walked closer to Jeremiah and placed her hand on his shoulder.
He turned to look at her with tears in his eyes.
“They hate me. The only way I got through those months was by drinking and leaving that house. Hearing her cries of pain or just sounding miserable made me want to go and see her and help her despite her hatred for me. I tried to sit with her at night, without her knowing, but she awoke and cursed me, telling me to leave her alone. I didn’t want the boys to suffer more. At that point, I think the painkillers the doctor gave her made her lose her mind a bit. Colton and Evan suffered enough.”
“I’m so sorry, Jeremiah. I wish there was something I could do to help you. I just don’t know if Colton and Evan can get past what happened and how they interpreted the situation then. Why didn’t you try to tell them after she had passed? I mean, did you try to contact them?”
He turned to look at her. He was struggling to share this with Ava, a complete stranger. She understood that, but what did he expect her to do?
“I was at my bottom and in a bad place when she died. I’m sure they recall my drunken stupor and how I showed up at Alicia’s funeral. They told me I was dead to them.” He took an unsteady breath.
“I…tried to kill myself that night, but someone intervened. I still think of him as my guardian angel.”
“Who was it?” she asked.
“Someone we know well. Although he’s in the medical field and deals with tragedy on a regular basis, he has empathy for those around him. It was Dr. Nickles, Ava.”
She covered her mouth with her hand and felt the tear roll down her cheek. When Dr. Nickles broke the news to her about the surgery and having cancer, he’d hugged her and told Ava that everything would be all right.
“He’s an amazing man.”
“Yes, he is an amazing man. He got me the help I needed to stop drinking, to get counseling, and to take control of my life. I don’t drink, as you know. I’ve come a long way and I love volunteering at the hospital and being there, when people feel like they don’t have a friend or someone to lean on.” He looked at her and held her gaze.
“I was really worried about you when you showed up alone when you have all those Dixie Chix around you to care for you. I wondered why you chose to keep your appointment a secret, and then you shared your story with me. Remember?”
“I remember well. You shared a little bit about your wife with me. I remember thinking that you must have loved her a bunch. It was the way you spoke of her.” The words got caught in her throat.
“I’m okay with talking about it all now. I see that I should have done things a little differently, but what’s done is done.”
“Why don’t you try to talk with Colton and Evan, just the way you’re talking with me now?”
“I would like to, but you saw their reaction the other day. They hate me. I don’t know how to get them to listen.”
The back door to the dance hall opened up and Colton and Evan pushed through.
“What the hell is going on? Why are you out here with him?” Colton yelled as he stared at her, appearing shocked. Immediately she placed herself in front of Jeremiah as Evan surged forward.
“Stop. Jeremiah and I were talking. He’s a friend of mine and he was checking up on me,” Ava said very calmly. She hoped her soothing tone would calm the situation, but Colton and Evan looked hurt by her words.
“He can’t be a friend of yours. He can’t be trusted,” Evan stated.
“Son, we need to talk. I was just trying to—”
“I know what you’re trying to do. You just can’t stop yourself, can you? You won’t be happy until you’ve killed us, too,” Colton said, and Ava was shocked by the hurt in Colton’s tone and words. These men were all suffering so much.
She reached out to Colton and Evan. “Please listen to him. Please take a moment to hear what he has to say.”
“No, Ava. You don’t know him. We do. Let’s go,” Evan said as he grabbed Ava by her hand and pulled her against him. Evan wrapped an arm around her waist and held her close. She pressed her hands against his chest, compelled to make them understand that they were all hurting and it needed to stop.
“Wait, Evan. Please listen to me.” Ava pulled from his arms and stepped to the side.
