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“No. Because you’re obviously in love with someone else and you didn’t have the guts to tell me that. Instead, you led me on and wasted my time.”
Justin turns on his heel and stalks off. I didn’t lead him on, did I? I wasn’t with FC and I was doing my best to give my all to being in a relationship with Justin because that’s what I wanted. I wanted to be with someone else, someone like Justin.
Because you couldn’t be with FC, a voice whispers in my head.
Well, now I feel like a terrible person. Justin has every reason to be upset with me. I probably should have never been in a relationship with him. And unless I get rid of these feelings for FC, or cut him out of my life completely, I shouldn’t date anyone else.
Karen, Lila’s mother, texted me. Lila is in labor. Sawyer isn’t due until March! It’s too soon. She’s only thirty-three weeks pregnant. As soon as I’m in the car, I call my parents.
Other than that, they are on their way, one of the first things they tell me is, “FC, you shouldn’t go to the hospital. There’s a restraining order.”
“I don’t care!” I fire back. “My kid could very well be born today, and I’ll be damned if I’m not going to the hospital because there’s a restraining order against Lila.” I want to make sure he gets the name I want, too. I need to make sure he’s okay, most importantly. Secondly, I want to find out why she’s going into labor so early. What the fuck did Lila do? I wouldn’t put it past her to somehow get the process going early just so I’d have to come back and see her sooner. If it’s possible to do such a thing, she probably did it.
My nerves are so on edge that I’m so fucking tempted to buy cigarettes on the way there, but that part of my life is officially over. Sawyer will never smell the stench from smoking or alcohol on me. My stomach revolts over the contents of breakfast, wanting to shove them back up my throat, but I don’t have time to throw up. I need to get to the hospital and check on my son.
By the time I get to the hospital and tell them who I am, I’m quickly ushered into a waiting room where Karen anxiously waits with Lila’s father, Bobby.
“No one’s with her? What’s happening?”
“She’s giving birth,” her mother explains. “We were made to wait here.” She doesn’t say whether that’s due to Lila or the doctors. “We’re glad you’re here, FC. Maybe now that the baby is coming you two can get over your issues and act like adults.”
Oh, what a bitch. I sit in the chair across from her, leaning forward with my elbows resting on my knees. “Let me tell you how this is going to work, Karen. I’m here for Sawyer. My relationship with your daughter is over. I plan to fight for full custody of my child and either you can help me, or you can support not only Lila, but her and what I don’t pay in child support. How does that sound?” She opens her mouth, but I don’t let her speak. “You and I both know she’s a terrible girlfriend and if you don’t believe me, I’ll show you what she did to my back. She trapped me with this baby and I’ll be damned if I trust her to raise him. He’s mine. So unless you want to pay for her lawyer and fight me in court until I get what I want, I suggest you figure out a way to talk some sense into her and make the process go smoothly.”
“You can’t take her child from her,” Karen protests.
“Don’t tell me I can’t take a child she doesn’t want. That she’s only having because she thinks it’ll make me stay with her. I will because that’s what’s best for Sawyer. I have months’ worth of documentation and photographs from where she’s…” I falter on the word, not sure I can say it anymore. “I have proof she’s not a good person. You give me a week with her around my son and I bet you all the money in my bank account that she’s an unfit mother.”
Karen purses her lips and Bobby says, “We want to
be in our grandchild’s life, FC.”
“I don’t have a problem with that. My problem is with Lila. The only reason I’m telling you what I plan to do is because you are the dumb asses who support her, so you’ll foot the lawyer’s bill. If you care anything about Sawyer, you’ll help me in whatever way you can.”
Just then, a doctor comes into the room. “Lila is recovering just fine and we have a baby boy, weighing in at exactly four pounds.”
I stand. “I’d like to see my son.”
“He’s still being looked over, but I can bring you on back.”
Apparently, Lila refuses to hold Sawyer, giving some lame ass excuse. When I first see him, it’s in the nursery. Damn, he’s so tiny. They have him in this device to warm him up because his temperature is too low. I crouch to be eye level with his body, so I can talk to him.
“Hey, Sawyer,” I say softly, tears spilling over when his head turns toward me. “Don’t worry about being in this thing or anything else that happens in this place. You’ll be okay. You’re a Hart and that means you’re one tough boy. If I can survive what I have, you can certainly survive being born a little early.”
I wipe away the tears and take a moment to compose myself. Who knew my heart would feel so full right now? He’s such a beautiful baby. “I know you haven’t felt much love yet, but now that we can spend some time together, you will. I’ll take care of everything for us.”
“Sir?”
Standing upright, I turn and see a nurse. “Yes?”
“You can reach in and hold his hand if you’d like.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Does he have a name yet?” she asks as she gets me all ready to hold my son’s hand.
“Sawyer Nash Hart. Lila didn’t tell y’all?”
“She didn’t.”
