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He grinned and shook my hand. “Tanner McAdams. Pleasure to meet you, Juliette.”
I could hear Logan speaking low and firm as he pointed a finger in Melanie’s face. “Listen to me, Mel. I know you’re scared, I know you feel like shit. You’re going to for a while, but- hey, you look at me when I’m talking to you. You’re going to feel like roadkill for a while, but at least you’re still feeling. You’re still alive, you have parents that are willing to go above and beyond to make sure you get the best possible help. Melanie, you have a fuckton of people in your corner. Take advantage of it. Go get better.”
Her response was too low, but then I heard him speak again and my breath caught in my throat. “I’ve been sick for a little while now, and I’ve only told one person. Because I feel weak, because I feel ashamed of myself for not being able to get better. I’ve shut out the people closest to me so that I can pretend everything is alright. But I let in one person, just one, and she’s been doing wonders. Because I don’t feel alone. Neither are you. It’s bullshit to think otherwise. Keeping secrets, lying. Sneaking around. It’s all bullshit, Melanie. And it’s so fucking hard. You don’t want to deal with this anymore, do you? No? Good, me either. Now get your ass up, get into my friend’s truck and kick your addiction’s ass.”
His response was so raw and honest that I was actually left speechless. His words were brutal, a punch to the gut. But they held meaning.
“Hey,” Tanner said and tapped me on the shoulder. “He’s a good guy. A little rough around the edges, but we all are. Guys kinda suck. He’s a good person though, and I have a feeling he’s going through some shit. Take care of him, yeah?”
I nodded my head silently and then watched as they helped transfer Melanie from Logan’s car to Tanner’s truck. His friend gave
me one last nod of recognition, a silent warning to take care of his buddy, and then he was pulling out onto the main road and his taillights disappeared into the darkness.
Logan rested his hand on the small of my back and he kissed my temple. His lips lingered there for a minute. “You heard all that?” he murmured.
I nodded my head and then turned to him, our eyes meeting. “I did.”
“And?”
And what? I didn’t have a single negative thing to say to Logan about what he’d said to Melanie. He’d been so candid with her about the fact that he was struggling too. I didn’t have a comeback for that. No sarcastic response.
“When I’m with you I don’t feel so alone.”
He smiled and pulled me close. “No room for bullshit?”
“None.”
Chapter 15
L ogan and I were laying in bed that night, my head on his chest and his arm wrapped around my back, holding me close. Our heart rates had just returned to normal and between my legs was still tingling with the aftershocks of my third orgasm of the night.
The sheets twisted around us as I hitched my leg over his hip and looked out the window. It was cold out and I could see the way the moonlight hit the ocean, the sound of the waves lapping against the side of the house lulling me. I dozed, eyelids heavy while Logan trailed his fingers up and down my spine.
“I love your hair,” he whispered softly.
My red tresses were sprawled across his chest, a stark contrast to his skin tone. “It’s getting too long,” I mumbled sleepily.
“Don’t ever cut it. I love it.”
I smiled as I felt him twirl a few thick strands around his finger. I was sleepy and content with things. It was somewhere between one and three in the morning and the world was quiet. Sleeping. The middle of the night had quickly become my favorite because it meant that I’d be in Logan’s arms, in his bed. Safe.
“Are you awake?” he whispered after a few minutes.
“No,” I whispered back, laughing.
“What’s one thing you really want out of life?”
That was a loaded question. My eyes opened and I lifted my head, flipping onto my stomach and staring up at him as he looked down at me. I rested my chin in my palm as he turned on his side and slid a hand down my back, dragging the sheet down and revealing my naked body.
What did I want out of life? I had no idea. Before Logan, I wanted peace and quiet. I wanted to fly under the radar, work hard and save money. But, for what? Why did I want that?
“I want…” I trailed off and stopped, chewing my lip. “I want love. I’ve spent so long alone, by myself. No companionship or relationships. It was like I was completely numb to the fact that I was so alone. Lonely. No matter how busy I was, no matter how much I worked, when the day came to an end I was still alone. I don’t want that anymore.”
My chest hurt as though I’d ripped my heart out and exposed my deepest, darkest secret. I was lonely. I felt raw, vulnerable. Not only was I exposing my secrets and desires, I was stark naked with not even a sheet covering me next to a man next to a man that I was in love with.
Love.
I was in love with Logan.
