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She didn’t.

Every grunts—a main man vocal expression he performs from time to time. “Why didn’t we think of that?”



And so they do, getting the six nutcracker guards to set up nets—actual ones made of polyester and rope—around the town. It turns the Christmassy town of Fairyland into some kind of anti-zombie stronghold Lily only ever sees in post-apocalyptic movies.

That is, the nets are horribly ugly.

“Maybe we should use syrupy threads instead?” Lily asks her man as they patrol the place the next morning, sturdy nets set up all the way to the running chocolate river banks.

He strokes her thin arm absentmindedly as they study the nets.

The mice still haven’t advanced further, their camps over the mountains still too far to see with the naked eye.

Every sighs and smooths down the lapels of a new suit he had changed into this morning. He truly tries to wear as many suits as he can, because it underlines his role of being an enigmatic billionaire, whatever that means. “Oh, Lily, you had so many bright ideas lately that I decided you must have already grown out of your utter stupidity. I guess not, then.”

CHAPTER 20: YESES AND YEAHS AND YEAS

Lily can now understand why CEOs and office workers get such big paychecks, as opposed to the minimum wage of part-time baristas like her. It’s most probably because sitting in meetings and watching folks bitch at each other is just, oh, so boring. No one in their right mind would do it willingly.

It is more tedious than when she was seven and took an avid interest in watching snails walk. Way worse than spilling coffee around the shop and grooming llamas and running a pizza delivery service. Or watching toddlers fight and yank each other’s hair out or marking exam results for a lazy professor, as a TA.

All of Lily’s previous jobs, actually.

Though she has a sneaking suspicion that she may already be fired from all of the above, thanks to the whole clusterfuck her life has now become.

She’s basically turned into Clara, whisked away from her family home by the nutcracker prince—that is, Every—and brought into a fever dream, which is this land of sweets.

Not sweet at all.

Speaking of her old life, her sissy didn’t even call after that one a couple of weeks ago. And her momma? Never. They probably think that she had already ran away and is in a better place, resting in peace.

What. That just makes it sound like she died.

And technically, she did run away, but unintentionally. Though she isn’t in a better place than the remodeled ranch, not even close. She’d trade staying at home and watching her sister and her ex make out on the couch for sitting her ass in this boring fucking meeting any day.

“But that still wouldn’t get the army to move away,” one of the twin scientists tiredly drones in a very monotonous voice.

“I’m aware of that, silly,” Lily says, although she previously wasn’t. “But it would keep the houses safe from teeth marks and consumption, yeah?”

“And how do you propose we deal with the army, the generals, and the mouse king?”

Lily raises up both hands in defeat. “As if I’d know that, bitch.”

How sassy of her.

“Every Darkindeep Ebonyngrey Wolfmane, son of Everett, prince of the nutcrackers, first knight of Fairyland, do you have any suggestions?” The scientist calls his full name.

Every shrugs, leaning back into the plush marshmallow chair. “I don’t even know what we’re talking about.”

She just shakes her head, but goes silent, a total blessing for Lily.

This twin, Felicity or Fertility—she could not be sure; they look alike down to the color of beads in their braids—sure is starting to remind her of her elementary school teacher, Ms. Something, who made her hate science that year.

And was years before Mrs. Savvy’s mind-breaking, brain cell-killing high school science.

She hadn’t changed her mind since.