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Chapter 19

Wren

Ipacked my rucksack that night, unpacked it an hour later, and then packed it again sometime around two in the morning.

I had my phone back, forty dollars in cash, and a debit card. There was a boatman on the east side of the island, and I knew where the path down the cliff began. I had no idea whether Tomás would take me across without Jax or hand me over to Vey before we even made it out of the cove, but by then I was desperate enough to treat every dangerous possibility as an option.

If I left soon enough, I could reach the mainland before dawn. From there, I could find the nearest Council office, walk inside, put my hands on the desk, and tell them exactly what they wanted to hear.

Here I am. I'm what you want. Let her go.

If I did that, Marion could be home by Christmas. Kaelen would be free of me. My boys would stop making reckless choices because they thought they had to protect me, and no one else would have to get hurt because of something that had started with me.

At least, that was what I kept telling myself.

The only thing keeping me from leaving was Marion's note, which still sat on the washstand beside the wren.

Don't come. Don't bargain.

I had read those words so many times that I could see them even when I closed my eyes.

She had known exactly what I would try to do.

But if I listened to her, what then? I stayed here while she sat in a Council cell because of me?

And if I didn't go, who would?

I folded my big gray sweater and tucked it into the top of the rucksack, then pulled the straps tight and sat on the edge of the bed with the bag in my lap. The room was so quiet that I could hear Silas on the landing outside.

His breathing came slow and even through the door, interrupted now and then by the soft scrape of his knife. He had been sitting out there both nights since the announcement. There was no chance he hadn't heard me opening drawers, folding clothes, and fastening buckles, but he hadn't knocked once or asked what I was doing.

For once, no one was going to make the decision for me.

At four in the morning, I unpacked the bag again.

I lay down fully dressed on top of the covers and stared at the ceiling until the darkness outside the windows began to lift.

By the time morning had properly arrived, I had packed it again.

I still had no idea what I was going to do.

Tamsin found me at eleven.

She pushed the door open with her shoulder, balancing a plate in each hand and holding a fork between her teeth.

She stopped when she saw me sitting on the edge of the bed in my coat with the rucksack balanced across my knees.

After a moment, she slowly took the fork out of her mouth.

"What are you doing?"

"Tam—"

"Um, no." She kicked the door shut behind her. "Absolutely not. We are not doing this." She shoved one of the plates into my hands and dropped onto the bed beside me hard enough to make the iron frame bounce.