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“Mmmm.” Larkin took another bite of warm bread thickly slathered in butter. With his mouth full, he asked, “See? Isn’t it literally the best?”

I nodded, finishing my second slice. It had taken us a couple of hours to make it thanks to the time spent waiting for the dough to proof, during which we’d played more old video games, but it had definitely been worth it. Mainly because I’d got to spend all evening with Larkin again.

Sitting cross-legged beside me on the couch, he uncurled a leg to nudge me with his foot. “And now you have the stuff to make it again. The pan and everything.”

I smiled, unable to stop myself from grabbing his foot and squeezing it gently. “I wouldn’t risk making it again without you. I’d fuck it up.”

He sighed dramatically. “Then I guess I’ll have to come over every week to help you make fresh bread.”

He peeked at me after saying it, curling his socked toes against my palm. My chest tightened with longing, but I managed to give him a wry smile.

“You don’t want to spend an evening every week with a boring old wolf.”

“I do want to,” he said immediately, then stuffed the rest of his bread in his mouth as his cheeks flushed. “And you’re not boring,” he added in a muffled voice. “Or old.”

I nodded at the TV. “My gaming set-up begs to differ.”

“It’s old-school. Nostalgic, like you said. It’s cool.” He cleared his throat and reached for his soda on the coffee table as he reiterated, “And I do want to. Come over every week, I mean. If you want me to.”

“Of course I want you to,” I said without thinking, then tensed as I worried about how he’d read into that. I quickly added, “Like you said, this is way better than storebought bread.”

Larkin smiled, but it was a little wan. Not as radiant as it usually was.

Swallowing nervously, wondering if I’d said the wrong thing, I rubbed his foot with my thumb and asked, “Are you feeling better? After earlier? Sorry, I should’ve already asked.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” His voice was a little hoarse, expression hidden from me as he put his drink back down. “Um, sorry I didn’t reply to your text. My phone was on silent.”

“That’s okay. I was just… worried about you.”

Larkin looked up and stared at me, something flashing through his eyes. In a rush, he was suddenly scrambling up, grabbing my face and crushing his mouth to mine. I froze in shock for a split second, then kissed him back, my breath hitching when he clambered over to straddle my lap and wrap his arms around my neck.

Our tongues slid together hungrily for long moments, and my breaths were trembling slightly when the kiss finally ended.

“I thought… I thought you didn’t want a lesson tonight,” I croaked.

“I don’t.” His voice was barely above a whisper. “This isn’t a lesson, Seb. I just wanted to do that. Is… is that okay?”

Fuck. Fuck. He couldn’t do this to me. He couldn’t make me hope like this. It didn’t feel fair. It would ruin me.

“Yes,” I still breathed, because I was incapable of saying no to him. “Of course that’s okay.”

“Only if you want to.” Now he was staring at me like he was trying to detect something, which was making me nervous. “You obviously don’t have to k-kiss me if you don’t want to. Sorry, I should’ve asked before—”

“I want to.” I always wanted to. Always.

Throat bobbing, he leaned back in shyly and kissed me again, soft and sweet. And for some reason, I knew at that moment that this would be the kiss that tortured me the most once this had all ended. The one I’d think about endlessly above all the others. The one he’d given me just because he wanted to—because he wanted to kiss me, not the guy teaching him all about sex.

This was the kiss that would haunt me long after he’d moved on.

—

It took me a second to work out where I was when I woke up. The back of my neck ached, and a weak blueish light was flickering, letting me see that I was in the living room when I blinked open my heavy eyes.

I’d fallen asleep on the couch, my head resting uncomfortably against the armrest.

And Larkin was on top of me.

We’d been watching a movie. The TV now showed a holding screen, cycling through ads for various new releases. I’d been tired after my run, and when I kept yawning, Larkin had chuckled and told me to lie down. Then he’d crawled over me, pausing to ask if it was okay as he gazed at me with big eyes.