Page 62

* * *

Heather woke and found herself alone in the bed. At first she thought Jim was somewhere else in the apartment, but as she walked through the living room, she realized he was gone. A cold shiver rippled down her spine. Why hadn’t he told her he was leaving?

Her feeling of uneasiness persisted through the morning as she got Diane ready, then drove to the office. What had happened? Had he been so disgusted by her confession that he’d had to leave? Had she been wrong to admit her feelings?

“Don’t panic,” she told herself. “Everything is fine. There’s a perfectly logical explanation why he left. He probably just didn’t want to be seen walking out of the apartment first thing in the morning.”

That had to be it. She’d meant what she said last night. That while she did love him, she didn’t expect that fact to fundamentally change their relationship. Or was she fooling herself? Heather stopped at a red light and bit her lower lip. She was willing to admit that in the back of her mind, she had sort of hoped that Jim might respond in kind and open up a discussion about…what? she asked herself. Their future? Did they have a future? Did she want one?

She searched her heart as she drove. Did she want to risk loving a man all over again? Did she want to go through the pain and suffering and the potential for heartbreak, all in the name of love?

She pictured Jim’s face as he held her daughter. She remembered his determination to help Brian, and the way he laughed and that silly dimple that made her thighs go up in flames. She thought of how thoughtful he was and the gentleness in his hands and his voice and his heart.

Yes, she did want to risk it all.

The office was empty when she arrived. Flo was probably in one of the hangars checking on flight records. Heather settled Diane, then made her way to her own desk and sat down. A stack of papers lay where she’d left them. Jim had put an envelope on top.

Frowning, she opened it, then read the tersely worded three-line message. In it he told her that he’d found her a different part-time job. The hours were just as flexible, but the pay was better and she started work on Monday.

She scanned it twice in disbelief. He was getting rid of her, just like he got rid of everyone else in his life.

Chapter Fifteen

The first sob tore at Heather like a great monster. She tried to hold back, to gain some kind of control, but the shock was too great. She could only sink into her chair and wonder why this was happening. She’d known that Jim would have some problems accepting the fact that she loved him, but she’d thought he might go into a panic mode and list the fifty-seven reasons why they couldn’t be a couple. She hadn’t anticipated he would toss her out of his life. The pain was so sharp it hurt to breathe.

“What’s wrong?”

Heather looked up and saw Flo standing in front of her desk. She hadn’t heard the other woman come into the office.

“Is it Diane?”

Heather reached for a tissue. She shook her head, then handed her friend the note. “He wants me to go.”

Flo scanned the message, then sank into the chair next to Heather’s desk. “Okay. Take a deep breath and start at the beginning. What happened?”

“Nothing. Everything. I told him I loved him.” Another sob caught in her throat. She wiped her face and gave Flo a brief account of the events from the previous evening. “I can’t believe I said it, and now he wants me to leave, just like that.”

Flo leaned forward and squeezed her hand. “He doesn’t want you to go. The man can be as thick as a board sometimes, especially when it comes to things like this, but you can’t take him seriously.”

Heather’s stomach churned. She thought she might be sick. “How else can I take it?”

“The way he meant it. He’s scared. He’s reacting, not thinking. Do you really believe that man wants you to go?” Flo’s full red lips pulled into a straight line. “You can still turn this all around, but it’s going to take some work. Jim won’t make it easy. Not for one second. So what you have to decide is what it’s worth to you. How far are you willing to go to be with this man?”

“I don’t know,” Heather admitted. “I can’t help thinking I’ve been a fool for love—again. I should have learned my lesson by now, but I ignored all the warnings. I feel like Jim pulled me in and made me think he was this incredibly perfect man. At least with the others, I knew they were flawed. But I thought he was a real, live hero.”

“Is that who you fell in love with?” Flo asked. “A hero? Is that what you need him to be? I thought you were interested in the man.” She rose to her feet. “If what you’re looking for is a hero, then he’s better off without you.”

Heather stared in stunned astonishment. Flo’s words stung like salt in an open wound. Anger flared. “You’re certainly quick to write me off,” she snapped. “I guess you and Jim really are two of a kind. I don’t know why I didn’t see it before. To answer your question, although I don’t know why I’m bothering, no, I don’t need or want Jim to be a hero. I want him to be an ordinary man. Because of all he’s done, I forgot that he’s just like everyone else. I thought he was perfect, or at least perfect for me. I knew he had some reluctance to getting involved, but then, doesn’t everyone? My sense of betrayal comes from the realization that not only wasn’t he going to love me back, but he’d also let my feelings for him drive him away. I thought he was capable of growing and changing, and he’s not. At least not with me. He would rather be right and safe—and alone—than risk love.”

Flo smiled and leaned back against the chair. “Well, why didn’t you just say so?”

Heather stared in outrage. “You were testing me?”

“Not exactly. I was trying to figure out how much you cared. You love the man.”

“Of course I do. I said that.”

“There are many different kinds of love. You said you told him that you still wanted to be friends, but it’s more than that, isn’t it?”