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“Yea?” I eyed her down, I slightly pulled my hoodie back a little and looked over her shoulder looking directly at her nigga that mugged me hard. He mouthed ‘dusty ass nigga’ and I winked at him. If he got stupid, I had no problem blowing his head off, to protect the dope and money I had in my backpack.

“I thought you were walking me home so we could go over all the missing assignments. You know, Soul… if you don’t make up these assignments then you can’t finish out the year playing football.”

“Fuck football, I got plays and moves to make. I’ll walk you home tomorrow and we can do the assignments though.” I hiked my backpack up. I didn’t want to really disappoint her but the only thing I gave a fuck about right now was making ends meet. Only reason why I stayed in school was because Queen insisted that I go. She paid a grip too. I didn’t like the uppity ass private school nor the kids there. It felt like I was too grown to even be there even though I was turning eighteen really soon.

“Right, don’t let this street shit suck you in, Soulful. I want to help you.” She softly said as her eyes batted at me. Her smell was intoxicating as fuck, and I had to remind myself that a girl like Jocelyn would never fuck with a dirty nigga like me.

“I appreciate you; I’ll see what I can do. Get back to your nigga, the way he looking at me got me uncomfortable.” I was on go and I already heard all about that nigga. He was a stick-up kid, all the jewelry that was on him had been stolen. I didn’t want to chance having to pop her nigga.

“Okay but wait for me tomorrow, after school Soulful.” She gave me that innocent smile and pulled her glasses up. Touching my forearm softly, she turned and walked away, right into that nigga’s arms. I got pissed when he grabbed a handful of ass and winked at me. I couldn’t help the angry chuckle that left my mouth. I turned and finished the ten-minute walk to my house.

Arriving home, I stopped at the door when I heard music and good smelling food. It felt too good to be true if it was my mom up in here throwing down like she used to back when I was younger. I let myself in and couldn’t hide my smile. My sisters greeted me and got back to doing their thing which was sitting on the couch watching TV. They looked content with their pajamas on and for once they weren’t asking me what was for dinner.

I walked out of the living room and into the kitchen. My mom had music playing as she took some fried chicken out the frying pan and put it on a paper plate that was laced with paper towels to catch the grease. When she looked at me, she was sober, and I could see the sparkle in her eyes. I was tired as hell and felt relieved that I didn’t have to put together another nasty meal. The kitchen and living room were clean and it smelled damn good. I embraced my mom tight to show her my appreciation and then went to the back to hide my dope until tomorrow. I just silently prayed that she kept this shit up. Me and the girls needed her more than she knew. I would hustle from sun up to sun down to provide for my mom and sisters just to have my momma home and drug free. The logical and negative side of me knew that it wouldn’t be long before she left and went back to the streets. My mom was the first and only woman that kept repeatedly breaking and ripping a niggas heart out.

Jocelyn was now the second woman to break my heart and I didn’t know if I could or would ever recover from this shit. I finally found my strength and looked up into her face.

“Jah, rather you believe me or not. I never cheated on you. My first-time cheating was a couple of weeks ago. I was wrong as fuck for that shit too. I did it and I guess it was because I was missing intimacy from you. I missed when you were there for me and cheering me on like I’ve always cheered for you. I always stayed planted and loyal to you through it all even when it felt like it was too much. I don’t even know what to say, but just know you really fucked me up. You fucked me up so bad and I can’t even deny how hurt I am right now.” I sighed and finally stood up to my feet.

“I’m so loyal of a nigga that even though you did me wrong as fuck ma, I won’t turn my back on you entirely. I’ll pay for your divorce lawyer and mine and you can keep this house and get whatever spousal shit that I know you gon’ go after.” I turned away and walked towards the long hallway that led to the steps to get me to my room. I stopped walking when a thought crossed my mind.

“If you even think about going to talk to the police, I mean, if I even think that you thinking bout running your mouth on that nigga Dmack disappearance then best believe I’m gon’ relieve you of all your worries and fears by sending you and that baby right with him.” With that I walked away with a heavy mind and heart.

Chapter Twenty

ERA

I stifled a yawn and looked out the booth I was standing in. The time read five am. For a week and a half, I had been in grind mode. I already had recorded songs that Shelby got mixed and put out and advertised on big platforms. She had my EP mixed and mastered and plastered everywhere for the world to hear. I still had to second-guess because Devin was in the back of my mind.

I know by now he knew and heard of me going viral. I was waiting for him to work his magic and get it all shut down. That wasn’t the case so far and I was grateful for that. It’s really crazy how Shelby knew exactly what to do to get my name out there. She kept saying that she wanted me viral on every social media platform within twenty-four hours and sis wasn’t lying because I was viral as hell.

Even my next-door neighbors were congratulating me, and I didn’t know exactly for what because I wasn’t even a signed artist. Shelby stated that I didn’t need a record company to solidify my place in the industry. If I followed the steps, she provided she claimed that I could remain an independent artist and own all masters and royalties which sounded good as hell to me.

I asked her how much did I owe her because everything had a fee. Shelby let me know that her services had been covered and that when I made it big, I could decide if I still wanted to work with her as my manager. She said by then I would be bringing in the big bucks and I could decide how much I felt she was worth. So far, in my eyes, Shelby Watts was worth a lot because in just under two weeks she had my name buzzing. Sis wasn’t nothing to play around with and she had proven that in such a short time frame.

I blinked my burning eyes and looked out the booth waiting for the engineer to give me the signal. The beat finally dropped, and I caught the beat and let my voice soar. Just like that I was already in my element. I was finishing up an album that I never seemed to find time to complete being stuck with bills and finding the time to get in a good studio. I only had six more songs to write and complete, Shelby had me so pumped that soon as I got off work, I was headed straight home to write and listen to beats that she emailed me.

I was tired but pushed myself because I knew this was something that I really wanted. It was a dream of mine that I envisioned since a little girl. I had black circles forming around my eyes, I had only been functioning off a few hours of sleep for the past week. I’d get up every day at three in the morning shower and spend at least two hours in the studio. After the studio, I’d grab breakfast and head right to the restaurant to open up and oversee things.

My co-workers did a wonderful job at making things easier for me, so on my down time, I found myself in the back where my office was writing music. Soon, when the money started to roll in, I saw myself quitting but for now I needed all the money I could get so less sleep was the sacrifice to getting to where I needed to be. Shelby stood behind the engineer smoking a blunt while looking down intently at the mixing board.

She reached over and pressed a button to stop the track as I stifled a yawn not really wanting to show them how tired I was.

“Sounds a little flat Era, come out and drink some coffee then go back in.” She walked towards the couch and took a seat. Shelby was in her late forties and her persona screamed hood, but she knew how to get right down to business and conduct herself very professionally. I picked up my feet and made my way out the booth and took a seat right behind the mixer watching the engineer play around with buttons and replay the track. Picking up the coffee mug, I took slow sips as Shelby ashed her blunt and took another long tote.

“I got some good news and slightly bad news.” She smiled big, making me smile. I ignored the fact that she even had bad news to mix in with her good news. I was learning Shelby in the short amount of time that I met her. She loved saying she had good and bad news. Her bad news always consisted of the time frame of things which wasn’t always bad. I could adapt and make things work.

“B.E.T. want you to perform to fill in the artist that backed out at the last minute. It’s very last minute and you haven’t even established yourself yet in the industry. Understand what I told you though, one viral moment on social media can take whatever career you want to heights you never thought. You have millions of views and that takes most artists weeks to acquire. We have to jump on this and take advantage now. Watch, after this performance, your business email will be blowing up with proposal sharks. Record labels begging for your time and attention.”

I swallowed down hard as tears of joy stung my eyes. I didn’t think I heard her correctly. Not B.E.T. a channel I grew up watching and fantasizing being on. I looked at her like what she was saying wasn’t real.

“I don’t even know what to say… is Soulful behind all of this?” I didn’t know what made me ask that, but it was in the back of my mind, and the thought of him being behind such a big thing made me think of Devin. Devin felt like he had so much control and I didn’t want another man thinking he could take my dream away from me so they could shit all over me.

“Chile, he’s been paying for this state of the art studio time. Everything else is all me. If you want to know, he paid me a hefty amount of money. I asked him was it because he liked you and if he wanted something in return. He knows I don’t get in between dick and pussy favors or business.” My chest constricted with how straight to the point she was.

“His answer was, he felt like you were too good to be working in a restaurant when your voice sounded like it was touched by an angel. He also emphasized how beautiful you were, he said you had the voice and the look and that…” she looked away as her face went through a series of emotions.

“He said that we could give each other a big break. Listen Era, I don’t know you and Soulful’s situation, but he has always been a good friend to me. I’ve been in different industries, and I have been used, abused, and my name tarnished a couple of times. I have the tools and connections, if you make it, I make it and I promise I will stick to you like glue if you will let me.” She laughed a little. “I once had a man that black balled me so when you told me that on our first time talking, I felt connected to you in a way. I know what that pain feels like. That’s not a story for me to tell right now. All I know is that even though Soulful initiated us meeting. I will never turn away from you if he decides to speak and say some shit although I know he won’t. Soulful is very thorough and a hundred percent loyal.” I shook my head at that because he wasn’t loyal to his wife from what I gathered.