Page 27 of A SEAL’s Vigilant Heart

“Can I read the letter now?” She nodded. She watched his every expression. Watched as he rapidly blinked trying to stave off tears. Then he gave her that special Mason smile.

“Your mother was as special as you are. When did she write this, baby?”

“That’s what I don’t get. It was written two weeks before she died. It was after I was such a bitch.” He sifted his fingers through her hair so he could cup the back of her head. “Oh, Mason. All that time with her and I don’t know how she could have said such nice things. I hope she knew how much I loved her. I don’t know how she could have when I was such a mess at the end.”

“She knew, baby, she knew. Just reading this letter tells me she knew. Is that what the dreams have been about?”

“I hadn’t been able to figure them out until now. She’s been on my mind so much. Margie and Frannie have been great, but I wanted my mom to see me in my wedding dress.” She grabbed the Kleenex box. “Fuck! When am I going to stop crying? It hurts so much. I want her back.” Mason didn’t say anything. He just held her.

***

Mason needed to snag a tissue for himself. How could someone as loving and caring as Sophia think she had ever done anything she needed to atone for? He tried to imagine those last months in a tiny trailer with her mother, caring for her twenty-four-seven and not breaking.

She was sleeping soundly, he moved her so he could pick up some of the mess. He didn’t want her to have to deal with it in the morning. He quietly and carefully placed all of the things back into the box, and finally picked up the jewelry, untangling it as he went. He made note of a bright silver locket he had seen Caroline wearing in each of the pictures around the house and set it aside. The rest he put back into the jewelry box.

He carried Sophia into their bedroom, happy with the way she snuggled up next to him. Tonight she would finally sleep without bad dreams. He hated the talk he was going to have to have with her in the morning. Not the one where he convinced her she had basically been sleep deprived and in a torturous environment, and, of course, she would have come unglued a couple of times, anyone would have.

He was also going to suggest she see the same counselor who had helped her after the attack she had suffered two years ago. But it was really her mother who had done the most healing thing possible by writing that letter. Caroline Anderson was one hell of a woman, and Mason was just sorry he had never had a chance to meet her. No, he wasn’t worried about having that conversation at all.

It was the conversation where he had to tell Sophia he had been stupid and assumed instead of asking. She was going to kick his ever-loving ass from here to Coronado and back. Then the guys were going to take up where she left off. God, he really didn’t want to have to admit to this, but two things were forcing him to come clean. One was Drake Avery. If he knew, eventually it would get back to Sophia. But the more important thing was he didn’t want to keep something so important from the woman he was going to marry. He wanted to let her know how screwed up his thinking had been, and that he had learned his lesson. At least, he was pretty damn sure he had learned his lesson. Fuck, he better have learned his lesson.

“Mason?” Sophia yawned softly. “You’re thinking too hard. Hold me and sleep with me.” He smiled and kissed her swollen lips.

“You’re right.” He shifted down on the pillows, pulled her closer, and let his eyes drift shut. Just four, scratch that, three more days, and she would be his forever.