Page 106 of A Crown of Hopes and Sorrows

His chin dropped. “I know.”

“I understand now what you were trying to do. And I’m aware that I said my kingdom and my duty to it had to come before everything. But I think I was wrong about that.” I weighed that out in my mind. But I knew I believed the words I spoke. He meant well, and now he beat himself up over his choices. We couldn’t always be perfect.

And, even more than that, I wanted him. Desperately. Enough to pay the highest cost for it. “You’re the only person who truly gets to see me. Our relationship has been… more… to me.”

“I feel the same,” he whispered.

I met his gaze, the sadness and hope in the look he gave me ripping through my heart. I snaked my hand out, finding his. He froze, his muscles tensing, and I slipped my fingers into his, our flesh melding like flowers blooming between grasses together, stems twining alongside the other. “There’s something I want to do almost as much as shoving you into this lake, though.”

“What’s that?” he whispered.

“Kiss you.”

A muscle in his jaw tensed. “I would like that.”

I leaned in, the grassy-sweet smell of him hitting me. His form wrapped around mine, and our mouths met. The taste of him, the sturdiness of him beside me, felt like an eclipse fading, the sun coming back out, the world illuminating again.

Our lips parted, and I bowed my head against his. “I love you, Apollo. It’s stupid and confusing and difficult, and I’m convinced it’s going to be tragic for me. But being apart from you has been like trading a flower for the thorn. I don’t want to be separated anymore.”

“I don’t either. I promise, Hyacinth, I will never do anything like that again. And I won’t keep any more secrets from you. I swear it.” He swallowed, his eyelashes fluttering against my cheek. “You’re everything good in the world to me. I shall never love another as I do you.” His hands coursed along my arm like he carved me into stone, like he could capture me forever with his touch. “I don’t think I’ll ever love anyone again. You’ve ruined me.”

“That sounds like a long eternity for you.”

He breathed a laugh. “If you allow me to spend your mortal life with you, then every moment of missing you in that eternity will have been worth it.”

I pulled away and trailed my thumb over his cheek. “Can we try again?”

“Yes.” He nodded. “Yes, please.”

I grazed down his neck and kissed the edge of his collarbone. And then I stood, the wind pushing me back a step. “There are some apologies I need to make, but first, I want to blow off some steam.”

Apollo rose alongside me, and he cocked up an eyebrow.

I laughed. “Not like that. Though…” I slipped my fingers between his again. “Tonight, yes. I’ve missed that as well.”

His face still shone red, but a chuckle bubbled from his lips, his eyes twinkling. “Have you just been using me for my body?”

“Yeah, that and your amazing connections.”

His laughter filled me like wind rippling into sails, soaring me back onto the course I’d lost. He walked us over the shimmering rocks and down the trail. “I had actually promised Delon a game of discus. He says I owe him.”

“Didn’t you save his life?”

Apollo smiled, touching my hand gently, as if he grazed the tender petals of a new bloom. “That’s complicated.”

I took in the radiant sunshine of him. His hand linked with mine, our future stretching ahead. “I actually think that sounds perfect, golden boy.”

He rolled his eyes at the nickname, but his fingers tightened around mine. A hopefulness flooded through me that I hadn’t felt in a long time. I had been such an idiot. Did I seriously believe I could end things between us? I trailed him like the sun he was, golden and radiant. And I would follow him anywhere, right into the maw of death, if necessary.

Damn that prophecy and Clothos as well.

Of all the mistakes I’d made, the regrets I had, the actions I wished I could undo, splitting from Apollo topped the list. I wanted him in my life, and I’d risk anything for it.

He looked back over his shoulder once, as if to make sure I existed, that I still stood there. I offered him a smile, and he turned, leading us towards the discus field.

45

Artemis