Page 49 of The Secret Diary of Anne de Bourgh

“I have not forgotten it,” he assured her.

“That is not quite the same as promising to come,” she observed.

“No,” he admitted. “But I shall do my best.”

When he turned to me, I had a great many things I wished to say, none of which seemed suitable with everybody standing about us.

“Take care of yourself,” was all I managed.

“And you, Annie.” He pressed my hand before getting into the carriage.

I watched until it had passed out of sight. Then I went upstairs, where Luna was asleep upon my bed and quite indifferent to the departure of anybody, and cried into her fur for a full hour. Nobody came to disturb me, or ask me if I wanted any luncheon, not even my maid. I suspect Elizabeth may have had a very good idea of what I was doing, and ordered me left alone, for which I am deeply grateful.

29 July

Elizabeth says that none of us is to marry and then discover that clean sheets appear in a cupboard by some natural process which requires no attention from anybody.

Kitty said that she had never supposed any such thing.

“No? Then you will have no objection to helping Mrs Reynolds decide which of these tablecloths ought to be replaced.”

This was not quite the task Kitty had hoped to be given, but she submitted with tolerable grace.

Lizzy has been finding little duties for all four of us for some time. At first I thought she merely wished to keep us occupied, but she told us quite plainly that she considers it part of our preparation for households of our own.

We are not always permitted to choose what we should like to do. Mary would willingly spend every morning among the stores, making lists and asking questions, but Elizabeth says she must learn about other things as well.

This week I had been asked to go through several of the bedchambers with Mrs Reynolds, and note what might be wanted before our guests arrive for Georgiana’s birthday celebration. I was rather pleased with my list. There were candles to be supplied, a washstand with a loose handle, a curtain which did not draw properly, and two doors with hinges that squealed and required oiling. I had also remembered to ask whether there were enough blankets, though in this weather it seemed unlikely that anybody could wish for more. They were more likely to want windows that opened fully, which reminded me to go back and check that all of them did, without sticking in their frames or falling closed again once they were open.

When we met this morning to discuss what we had done, Elizabeth asked which rooms I proposed for the gentlemen who were expected.

I showed her.

“And their servants?”

I looked at her open-mouthed. I had entirely forgotten their servants.

Mrs Reynolds kindly assured me that she had not, but I was mortified.

“I cannot think how I came to overlook the servants!”

“You were considering the rooms I asked you to examine,” Elizabeth said. “Now you must consider what follows from putting somebody in them. There is no harm done.”

There was no harm done because Mrs Reynolds already knew what ought to be done. I should be very sorry to attempt any of this without her. It made me wonder about the housekeeper at Rosings; but I do not think they ever had to be anything like so efficient, because Lady Catherine ordered everything and would not allow a single thing to be done unless she had oversight of it. If I am ever to return to Rosings, I shall have to train new housekeepers.

I felt ill at the mere thought.

Georgiana had been considering what refreshments should be served during the evening. She had made a list, then crossed out nearly half of it because she thought there might be too much.

Elizabeth asked her to explain her choices.

By the time she had finished, several of the things had been put back.

“But perhaps you would prefer…” Georgiana began again, pen hovering, ready to cross out another item.

“I should prefer to hear what you wish, my dear. It is your birthday, and you have considered the matter very sensibly.”

Georgiana looked pleased, and stopped apologising for the list.