Page 37 of Nothing to Lose

“Oh, little brother. What did you do?”

I look over my shoulder at him, smirking. “You like it?”

“Fuck yes, I like it. I fucking love it. You’ve had this in all night?”

“Yeah, I’m so fucking turned on it’s not even funny anymore. I need you.”

“Yeah, baby, you do. Just like I need you.” Hunter grips the end of the plug and gives a gentle pull. “Take a deep breath for me so I can remove it.”

I do as he says, taking a deep breath and relaxing as he pops it free and tosses it to the side. “Fuuck, Eli, fuck, baby. Look at you, so open and ready.”

There’s some shuffling behind me, and then the wrap of a lube packet, followed by the cool trickle of it sliding down my crack. Hunter swipes the engorged head of his cock through it, nudging my hole.

“Fuck me, Hunt. I’m so desperate to feel you inside me I’m going to fucking lose it if you do—” My words are cut off as Hunter slams home, filling me in one powerful thrust. I lurch forward from the force, but he pulls me right back. He fucks me deep and hard, keeping the slapping noise to a minimum, but it still feels just as incredible.

“Fuck, yes. You’re so fucking tight. You feel so damn good,” he whispers.

“Just don’t fucking stop. Ahh! Fuck! Yeah!” Hunter quickly slaps a hand over my mouth.

“You don’t want to chance anyone hearing how you’re letting your brother fuck you senseless right now, do you? ’Cause I don’t want anyone to hear you come but me. Gotta be quiet and let me make you feel good.” Jesus Christ. Hunter spreads my legs farther, pistoning his hips harder, faster. I take every single inch and beg for more. I love the way my body stretches for him, the way he fills me so fucking perfectly. His hand slides up my back, pressing between my shoulder blades for me to drop. I go willingly, loving the change of angle it gives his cock against my prostate.

“That’s it, baby boy. Face down, arch that back. Ohh, fuck. I love you like this.” It’s fucking everything, and pleasure starts to coil tighter and tighter as he thrusts hard into me, jerking me forward every time he fills me. But this isn’t how I want to come.

Moving off of him, I turn and press against his chest, pushing him back down to sit on his ass, then I’m climbing on top, facing him. Hunter grips his cock, lining up and letting me fall right back down onto it. We both let out low moans that we smother with a kiss. I rock back and forth on him, my arms wrapped around his neck, his around my waist. We kiss like our lives depend on it, making all the silent promises that we aren’t ready to say out loud. Except for these. These he needs to hear. And not by reading it on some paper in front of thirty other people.

I break apart from our kiss, dropping my forehead to his, sharing air. I continue a slow, lazy rock on his dick, loving just having him inside me like this. Especially when I tell him how I feel.

“I need to confess.”

“So confess, baby. I’ve got you.”

“I’ve fallen in love with you.” Hunter’s grip on me tightens, tears springing to his eyes. He nods, that beautiful, infuriating, cocky smirk filling his face.

“I’ve always been in love with you.” His admission cracks something wide open in me, and my chest aches like it never has before. All this time, through everything, Hunter has been there, challenging me to be a better player, better person, being a safe place for me to land when shit gets too heavy or hard. Hunter’s been there on the sidelines, loving me, protecting me, being my shelter from all the bullshit, never asking me to be anything other than who I am at my core. A sob breaks free.

“I love you so much, Hunter, it feels like I can’t fucking breathe.”

“I know, baby,” he soothes as he rubs his hands up and down my spine. “We’ll do this together.” Then he’s pulling me down, kissing the tears I didn’t know were streaming down my face, licking them away with the sweetest touch. I melt further into him as I rock steadily back and forth, his strong hands keeping me anchored to him.

I hand over everything I have, everything I am, over to him. I make love to him like nothing else matters, like I’ve got nothing in the world to lose because now I have him, and at the end of the day, loving him is worth losing everything.

Chapter 22

Hunter

Eli sleeps in my arms inside the sleeping bag, our legs tangled together, his head right under my chin. Last night was intense, and I don’t regret any of it. How could I? It was a long time coming to say those words out loud, and while they weren’t my own, they’re still my truth just as much as they’re his. I thought I knew what it was going to say before I opened it, which is why he was about to pass out next to me, but nothing could prepare me for the words that he wrote. That he’s in love with a man. I could hear his voice in my head: “Pretty cocky of you to assume I’m talking about you.” But I knew without a shred of a doubt that he was. He loves me. Eli loves me.

I drop my lips down to his forehead, pressing them against his skin and inhaling his perfect scent. He loves me. I laugh, a short chuckle that shakes both of us.

“Mmm. Something funny?” I roll him onto his back, settling on top of him, cocooning his face with my hands.

“Yeah, baby boy, there is.”

“Care to share with the class? Or can I go back to sleep?”

I drop a kiss to the center of his forehead. Then each of his eyelids, his cheeks. “Say it again.”

Eli’s eyes finally open, looking up at me through a sleepy haze that’s so fucking cute.