Page 125 of The Gods Forbid

He also did not need to know that I actually needed to be steadied this time, or that his hand might have made it worse.

When we stepped through into the gallery, filled with art Sebastian had painted himself, a sharp slice of pain cut through my chest.

He was everywhere. He was standing behind me. He was in the paintings on the walls. He was in every inch of this room, and it was pressing down on me like the weight of the entire world.

I looked up at him, even though I knew that would do me no good. He was already looking down at me, looking at me like he was trying to catalog every one of my features to memory.

Even though that look was just a product of his power, my traitorous heart wanted to view it as more. To steal that look and make sure he never gave it to anyone else.

A low sound fell from his lips, and my eyes slipped down his nose to stare at his mouth. Another sound, much louder and more threatening, followed and I felt the heat of his hand hover over my hip.

I leaned into the touch, even though I knew better. I was getting closer and closer to convincing myself that it would be okay if we crossed the line into something physical.

I couldn’t think of much else these days besides wondering what his hands would feel like on me, what it would feel like if he used his—

“Your thoughts are written all over your face, love,” Sebastian all but growled, his words so rough they were almost chastising. “I’m starting to lose my—”

“Can we get this over quick? I have a date waiting on me.”

We sprang apart like two thieves caught standing in the middle of a vault. Luckily, Anders was looking down at his watch as he stepped out of the portal, blissfully unaware of what had almost happened between us.

When I looked back at Sebastian, his confident stance was back. He looked entirely unaffected, meanwhile my heart felt like it was going to beat right out of my chest. My entire body was pulsing, heat and desire pumping through my blood.

“Thank you, Anders,” I said, hoping my voice didn’t sound as strained to him as it did to my own ears.

Anders smiled, coming over to give me a quick kiss on the cheek.

“You’re the one who said you had somewhere to be. Stop lingering,” Sebastian snapped, arms crossed and staring Anders down like he was his next kill on a hunt.

Anders raised his eyebrows, still hovering close to me. “I’ll help you after I greet Persy. Given she’s the one who put in all the work fixing you.”

He didn’t need to be fixed. I clenched my jaw to keep the words inside. Sebastian had grown, repented, but he was the same man who’d bought me flowers and cooked me dinner from the moment we started living together.

“As much as I would normally love to sit here for hours talking about all her positive traits, I’d like this particular moment,” Sebastian said, his eyes focused on the sliver of space between Anders and I, “to be over as quickly as possible.”

Anders scoffed, shooting me a questioning look. I was aware that Sebastian had grown a little protective, but that didn’t change the fact that I was a temporary figure in his life.

“If you would, Anders,” I said, nodding at Sebastian. It felt necessary to add a quiet, “Please.”

I needed this to be over as soon as possible. Seeing Sebastian framed by his own work was too much. It was like every painting was meant to frame him, his form fitting perfectly into every landscape, chaotic scene, or portrait.

Thank goodness we’d landed on the other side of the wall from Sunlight Incarnate. I’d oscillated between growing furious at the thought of the woman in that painting and irrationally convincing myself that Sebastian had painted me.

As Anders reached for his hand, I turned, pretending to admire the paintings and sculptures. I could feel the hot pressure of someone’s eyes on my back, but refused to turn around.

If either of them saw the tears building in my eyes, I would have to explain myself.

So I stood there, staring at a painting that did nothing but remind me of the man who painted it, and listened as Anders sealed my fate.

There was a light whoosh through the room, a calm wind as Anders called on his power and confirmed whether or not Sebastian had reinstated heirs.

I held my breath the entire time, unsure which result was more damning.

“He’s right,” Anders said firmly. “Three heirs.”

Oh. Okay. So it was done.

I was pretty sure I felt my heart crack. Putting on a smile, I turned around, focusing on Anders. “Thank you so much. Adrian will be happy to hear it.”