Page 124 of The Gods Forbid

I could barely mutter a thank you, I fled the kitchen so fast. By the time I made it into my bathroom, I was all but heaving. Something felt much scarier now, like I was aware of every second that slipped through my fingers and pushed us closer and closer to the end of this.

I was in a daze the entire time I was getting ready, so much so I wished I’d asked Daphne to come help me get ready. When we were younger, she was the one who’d taught me how to do makeup. I could have used her right now.

Despite my nerves, I was happy with the way I looked. I’d done simple makeup, curling my hair into soft waves.

And the dress…it looked like liquid gold. It was strapless, dipping down quite low on my back, and pooling to the floor in a wash of gold fabric. I hadn’t realized until too late that it might have been a little on the nose, but I had been drawn to it.

By the time I was at my dresser, putting on a bracelet as a finishing touch, I was feeling marginally more settled.

“Ready?”

My back seized on instinct. I turned over my shoulder, finding Sebastian leaning against my door frame. I nodded quickly, unsure why my throat felt so tight. This was a good thing.

I should have been proud. Earlier than I expected, I’d be able to tell my brother that Sebastian’s line was safe, that we didn’t have to risk a world without art and music and light.

That was everything I should have wanted. I should be proud of myself. Instead, I was wondering whether or not it was acceptable to beg my brother not to kill him. It didn’t matter that he’d assured me multiple times he had no intention of doing so and actually wanted Sebastian to come back.

He was vulnerable now, and I didn’t like it.

I turned on shaky legs, looking down to adjust a few of my bracelets.

“You look beautiful, love.”

My head snapped up, meeting Sebastian’s observant gaze. The humor I was so used to seeing, the one that reminded me to keep distance between us, was no where to be found.

He looked as serious as the dead.

Nerves clawed up my throat. “I thought beautiful was too simple of a compliment?” I said, in an attempt to regain some control.

There wasn’t a lick of humor on Sebastian’s face. “They’re my rules. I can adjust them.”

My heart started to kick off a little faster, breaths pulling in shakier and shakier. This was going to be a rough night, I could already tell. I just needed to remind myself of our normal dynamic. Light teasing and easy smiles.

I could tell him how nice he looked. He looked perfect, actually.

It was rather annoying. I was trying really hard to set some internal boundaries and try not to take any of his actions personally. I didn’t know what he was like when he with other people. Maybe those easy compliments were how he was with everyone.

And I wasn’t supposed to want to be different than the rest.

This was just all so, so wrong.

“You look beautiful, as well,” I tried, but the words came out far too serious.

Sebastian’s face fell even further, his nostrils flaring slightly. He took a step into my room, towards me, then straightened. He ran a hand down the lapel of his suit, which had no business looking as good on him as it did.

Actually, it had every business looking like a piece of art on the god of it.

I forced a smile, walking past him in a wider arc to avoid the scent of his cologne. Sebastian turned and followed me, my back heating from his proximity.

“I told Anders to meet us in the Apollo Gallery,” I said, needing to focus on the to-do list. Sebastian—or Jason Dionysus, really—had decided that the Olympian Museum was as good as a location as any for the party. I wasn’t one to complain, especially since I hadn’t really been able to stop thinking about Sunlight Incarnate since I’d first seen it. “Then, the rest of the night you are free to be Apollo.”

I winced, realizing how snappy that sounded.

Before I could turn and change the subject, distracting from it, Sebastian was standing at my back. My stomach dipped and swooped, all my focus shooting into the nerves on my back to feel him more intensely.

He leaned in close, speaking directly in my ear. “Alright. After you, love.” I wished my hair wasn’t tucked behind it. It would have been easier if I had my hair to muffle the sound of his voice, making the lightning in my blood strike ground with such force, it made me sway back on my heels.

I gathered a portal, which took a second longer to manifest when my focus was this distracted. If Sebastian noticed, he didn’t comment on it. He just placed a hand at the base of my spine to steady me as I walked through.