Page 27 of Somebody To Love

“Then go out with me.”

“I can’t.”

“You already have a boyfriend? If so, dump him. I can treat you better than he can.”

I laughed. “Aren’t those song lyrics?”

“Yep, but they’re true.”

“You’re arrogant.”

“Nope. Just a little cocky.”

We both smiled at each other and I could feel my defenses breaking down.

“Ok,” I found myself saying. “I’ll go out with you, but you better be on your best behavior.”

He pulled my phone from my hand, programmed his number in and said, “We both know that you don’t want me to be on my best behavior, because that wouldn’t be very much fun.”

“Define fun.”

“You, me, naked, maybe drinks?”

I opened my mouth scandalized. Although I had images of Ty licking tequila from my belly button suddenly.

“I’m joking. I can be a gentleman…. if you want me to be.”

His words were so suggestive. He was cocky. And sexy. And funny. And too perfect for me.

He bid me farewell and made his way to the pizza shop. I tossed the pizzas in the front seat and then left well enough alone.

Now I had two dates lined up for the weekend. I was on fire.

“What do you think? Do you think this dress makes my breasts look like a uni-breast?”

“Uni-breast?” I said half turning around in Becca’s direction. She was trying her best to maneuver her body into a super tiny dress. Finally, it was up and over her head. Her long, curly blonde hair had kept getting caught in the straps of the dress.

“I hate when uni-breast happens” she said as she reached into her bra and adjusted her boobs. I did the same, but of course, it didn’t have the same effect. Becca was chesty and perky. I wasn’t flat-chested, but without a good bra, my boobs tended to prefer being droopy.

Becca had offered to come over and help me find something to wear for my date with Jean-Bernard, the guy the dating agency had set me up with. I was a ball of nerves, but I was feeling better now that Becca was there.

Becca was my brother’s second ex-wife and I thought it was hilarious how I was best of friends with both of his exes. He picked great women to marry, too bad he was such an ass and couldn’t keep them. I’m not sure if Becca had even been married to him for a year before she walked out on him. Rightfully so.

In true Becca fashion, she couldn’t spend a moment in my closet without feeling the need to try something on. So the evening went from her coming over to help me find something sexy to wear on my date to Becca completely forgetting about our mission and looking at herself in the mirror.

I shrugged as I looked at the dress I had on. I guess it was appropriate? Maybe? I didn’t know. I felt the agency would probably prefer if I looked classy instead of slutty. I think the dress I had on now would probably be considered a little on the slutty side. It was short, red and showed cleavage. Becca said it was hot. She was right. It was hot, but it was way too much.

I opened my closet again and listlessly started pulling clothes out. I wasn’t excited about dinner with Jean-Bernard. I knew he was French, but just his name alone sounded pretentious. If it weren’t for my contract, I would have texted him that I couldn’t make it. Not that I even had his number. But I read all the by-lines of my contract and there was no way I was going to cancel this date and pay a $100 fine like Sylvia had mentioned.

It felt weird to be pursued by two guys at a time. Not that I was actually being pursued, but still… I smiled at the thought of Ty. We’d had fun during our brief interactions with each other. I would never tell him that, but it was true. I didn’t know what it was about him that drove me crazy. I guess now that I decided to act like a “grown up” I just couldn’t be bothered with men that acted like children. It kind of made me feel like a fraud. But I wasn’t in the mood to focus on my feelings. That sounded much too complicated and exhausting. Instead I would focus on my date with Ty. Ooops, I meant Jean-Bernard. Ty was tomorrow... not that I was counting down the hours until I saw him or anything like that. (I totally was.)

Shoving thoughts of Ty out of my head, I reached for my most “serious” dress. It was a long maxi dress with a deep V-cut in the back that almost went down to my waist. It looked demure from the front and then when I turned around it was va-va-voom. I smiled and then my smile promptly fell. I think va-va-voom was supposed to be reserved for date two.

Didn’t Sylvia say something about making a man look forward to something? But what did I care what Sylvia said? She told me that she’d been married to the same guy for like fifteen years which meant she hadn’t had a real date in ages.

Either way, I found myself reaching for a demure, blue chiffon dress, while storing the black dress in the back of my closet for another time. Maybe the little red dress or the black dress would come out later for date number two with Jean-Bernard if he wasn’t a complete jerk. Or a quarter of a jerk.

I looked at the picture of him that Sylvia had sent me. He was a really good looking guy. But I couldn’t really believe the pictures. After all, photoshop was used liberally in this day and age. I’d been guilty of it myself. I erased a blemish or two in my own profile photos.