Page 41 of Highland Flame

“I found her in an infirmary in a priory, much like this one, and she died in my arms,” he explained. “She had been very ill for years, but I didna ken that. It seems once I ran away, she had a change of heart and wanted me back. She searched for me, and thought she found me. A young lad was mauled by a bear, and he was wearin’ the ring. She thought it was me who died since the child was too mangled to see his face anymore. She blamed herself for my death. Her heart and spirit had been broken and could never be mended after that. That’s why she left her profession and confessed all her sins to a priest, hopin’ to be forgiven.”

“She did? I dinna understand. Why did the monks let her stay with them if she was once a prostitute?”

“She gave them the ring she’d taken off the mangled child’s body. The ring that came from my faither. It was worth much, and the monks were able to sell it and use the money for their own needs.”

“I’m still confused. Why would an English nobleman give such an expensive ring to someone like her in the first place?”

“He didn’t. My mathair stole it from him after they . . . after I was conceived. I am no’ proud of the things my mathair did. Still, with her dyin’ breath, she told me the man had promised to marry her. That is why she did nothin’ to protect herself from gettin’ pregnant. The next mornin’, my faither changed his mind. My mathair thought she might be pregnant, and stole his ring to sell it to help raise me, once I was born. The problem was, she was in love with the man. She could never bring herself to sell the ring, after all.”

“I understand now. She was able to stay at the priory because she bought her way in.”

“No’ exactly. Ye see, once she thought I was dead, and she’d confessed her sins, she devoted her life to the Order.”

“She became a nun?” gasped Yvaine.

“Nay. She couldna be one since she had a dark past. Instead, she worked as a cook in the monks’ kitchens.”

“Cam, who was yer faither? If he had a signet ring, he must have been a noble.”

“I dinna ken the answer to that. My mathair never told me his name. I still remember the ring to this day. It had a big square, blue stone in it. It was a gold band, with circles around a wild boar in the middle.”

“I’m sure ye could have found out which Englishman bears that crest. It wouldna be hard to do.”

“I suppose I could have, but I didna want to. That is all in the past now, and I no longer care. Right now, all that matters to me is that I dinna repeat the mistakes of my mathair. I willna let Avianca grow up the way I did.”

“She’s already lived the first four years of her life in a brothel,” Yvaine pointed out.

“Aye, and that is damage I can never undo. I have been wonderin’ if perhaps I should bring her to live the rest of her life with me and the MacKeefe Clan.”

“Do ye really mean it?” asked Yvaine excitedly, so happy that Cam had not only told her of his past, but that he’d decided to be a father to the girl, after all.

“I was confused at first, but I ken now that it is the right thing to do. After I am accepted back into the clan, I will take her with me.”

“Oh, Cam, that’s wonderful,” cried Yvaine, reaching up and kissing him passionately on the mouth the way he had done to her. His hands slowly encircled her waist, pulling her closer as he returned the kiss. She wanted another kiss, but he gently pushed her away, and held her at arm’s length.

“Nay,” he said. “I canna kiss ye. It isna right.”

“Why no’?” she asked.

“Because, ye are goin’ to be a nun.” He shook his head, looking like he was struggling hard with this decision.

“What if I told ye that ye can kiss me? Would it be all right then?”

“What are ye sayin’?” he asked, looking as if he thought her disgusting to even allow it.

“Before ye judge me, let me explain. I am no’ goin’ to be a nun, and neither was I ever.”

“What are ye sayin’?” He looked so lost and confused.

“Ye are the one who thought I was goin’ to join the Order, but I never told ye it was true, did I?”

“I – I suppose no’,” he said, slowly sitting back down on the chair. “Why did ye no’ tell me all this sooner?”

“I was scared,” she admitted. “I didna ken a thing about ye, other than ye liked the lassies. I am sorry that I allowed ye to believe a lie, but I had just lost my husband and I – I guess I –”

“Shhh,” he said, pulling her over to him, and sitting her atop his lap. He gently rubbed his fingers over her arm to comfort her. “I understand, lass. If I were ye, I’d be leery of an awful man like me as well.”

“Nay! Dinna say such things. Ye are no’ awful, Cam,” she told him, throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him once again. “I am the awful one, no’ ye.”