Page 195 of Johnny

“There. I see one. And here’s my wish… I wish for payback.”

I stare at her for a moment. Because her expression is hard and the little bit of light from the sliver

of a moon cuts sharp shadows across her face. “Payback, huh? Like… revenge?”

She nods but says nothing. Just clenches her jaw and stares up at the night.

“I’m not sure that’s the spirit wishing-stars are looking for.”

“Too bad,” she says. “That’s just too fucking bad. Because I’m angry. I’m so mad that I was given

this life. Furious that I’m the one who has to make these decisions. I never asked for any of this and

—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” I say. And now it’s my turn to sit up and look down at her. “Easy there,

killer. I get it. I’m furious too. I don’t want this any more than you do. But one night, OK? Just… one

night. We don’t have to do anything right now. We can’t actually do anything right now. So…”

“My father is being tortured as we speak and you want me to—”

“Fucking forget it,” I say. “Just… whatever.”

I can’t justify this when she’s probably right. So fuck it.

I give up too.

There is a long silence after that.

Long silence.

I’m just about to get up and go back inside—maybe call Logan, or Jesse, or Joey and see if we can

figure out a way to make this all work out—when she says, “Sorry.”

I turn my head towards her and wait for the rest.

“I’m sorry. You have done more for me in the past few days than pretty much anyone else aside

from my father. So I owe you. And if this is how you want me to pay you back, then fine. I’ll find

some stupid stars to wish on.”

I think she holds her breath. But when I turn to look at her, I see that she is crying.

“What’s going on?” I ask. “Megan, I promise. We’re gonna figure it out. We’ll get him back and—”

“That’s not it,” she says. “That’s not it. I’ve been lying to you. I have a huge secret and they used

me to get to you. They told me that if I just let you rescue me and took you to that island, that my father

would be safe. But I did all that. And...”

“And then I killed everyone,” I finish for her. “I killed everyone and messed up their experiments.

And now the deal’s off.” I exhale. Long and loud. “It’s all my fault.”